May 23, 2005
The Storm Within
The Rolling Ozarks near Garfield AR These hills were alive with the sound of thunder!
Its been a difficult day for me. I understand a lot of what was driving me, making me cranky and edgy. Its hard when you don't get enough sleep.
We were treated to a spectacular thunderstorm Sunday night. Twelve hours of rock and roll lightning, I could hear the cracking of trees getting struck out on the golf course, the sound more intense because of our proximity to the shores of Table Rock lake. The water amplified the incredible noise, and the lightning was so continuous, that it seemed like we had a strobe light on.
Sleep has provided a stative for me these past few weeks so I dont have to think about things Id rather not. I am really trying to let the day take care of its own troubles. But the prolonged sleeplessness sent my mind into a tizzy of unwanted thoughts...
"what is wrong with me? I cant stay awake..."
"Im so mad at myself for falling asleep at the wheel"
"I know I am picking on Woody just to get a reaction, may God forgive me.."
"are we going to close on time?"
"did we do the right thing?"
"I want my kitties...," then I wondered how they delt with the lightning. In Hawaii they didnt mind it, perhaps not understanding it at all.
I tried to dwell on the promises of God, the good time Woody and I had the previous two days, saturday, a stay at home day at the condo, and Sunday after sleeping in, going to a lovely brunch at the
1886 Crescent Hotel in Eureka Springs We enjoyed not just the food but the atmosphere as well. Lovely live piano, and the spendour of this Victorian hotel was delightful.
After a big lunch you must walk around. And so we did. Many of the shops were open, so we walked and shopped. We had a lovely chance meeting with a street musician that played old acoustic ballads beautifully. We got a copy of her CD and have enjoyed that.
Upon return to the room from Eureka Springs, Woody retired to his room and I sat in the living room of the condo and watched the storm roll in. God has been very good to us. I am trying to relax and sleep more...
PS I have had this dropping off issue in the car for a long time,years even... at first we though that it was due to heavy antihistamine use, then extreme fatigue. I think its a sleep disorder, but I wont have it looked at until I am working and have insurance. As a result I have only put about 250 of the 3000 miles we have on the new car. I am very careful about it...
