July 21, 2008

"Because It Is The Hardest Thing I Can Do"

Earthrise as seen from the Command Module of Apollo 11. The Lunar module carrying Neil Armstrong and Edwin Aldrin is in the foreground NASA photo

My father told me once that astronaut Scott Carpenter was asked why he gave up a promising Navy career to join the Mercury 7. Then, after his stunning success flying Aurora 7 into orbit, he didnt stay with NASA, but went on to get involved with the SEALAB project and so on. His accidental injury that grounded him from space flight notwithstanding, Carpenter was said to have said "Because its the hardest thing I can do..."

I find myself totally relating to that mindset as I plunge through life's journey. I have not been one to settle for the easy road, and it has not always been met with success, however, there are few things in my life that I regret even though the outcome is currently unpleasant. I know that its not the bumps in the road but the road itself that is worthwhile


A Family photo left on the lunar surface by Astronaut Charles Duke Apollo 16 NASA photo

It has been my custom to write about my family and our struggle every year on the week of July 20Th. The Mercury-Gemini-Apollo missions are under rated and not discussed much, when every, and I do mean every facet of our lives has been changed by the incredible achievements of all who were involved in that great undertaking. I feel as do many of those families who had loved ones involved in the Space Program of the 60's and 70's that it was a military venture and that the sacrifices made were as honorable as any that were made by those in a shooting war. Both the post One Small Step For A Manand the post about my families pioneering spirit in this post One Giant Leap.

This year, as I have watched the documentaries When We Left Earthand Tom Hanks' masterpiece From Earth to the MoonI marveled anew at the determination of these people and how much I had personally given in losing my father to this war, even though he survived it and was a part of our lives for another 20 years. As I look at this photo of Charley Duke's family left for other explorers to find some day, I think that was our family, wrapped in plastic, left forever on the cold lunar surface forever frozen in time.

This seems to be a time for me to deal with the "first things" or "first works" as Jesus tells the church of Ephesus in Revelation 2:4-5

Nevertheless I have this against you, that you have left your first love. 5 Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent and do the first works, or else I will come to you quickly and remove your lampstand from its place--unless you repent.

I have had, in recent days, been confronted with a personality that closely resembles my father, really the best things about him and in him. But like my father, he isnt one to suffer fools gladly and seems to never be satisfied with my poor offerings and efforts. Like the child I was so many years ago I have felt the joy of life being slowly and painfully crushed out of me in these last weeks. Do the first works??? Forgiveness,gentleness and kindness in the face of harshness and worse being just ignored as though I am invisible. I know that forgiving my parents and extended family for this sort of treatment is something I must put into practice as well. And it isnt natural or easy, it takes as much determination as anything. However it is a thing worth doing and pays a high reward in the end...and I choose to do it... after all it is the hardest thing I can do...

Earthrise taken from the Command Module of Apollo 17 NASA

Photo Credits Boston.com "The Big Picture"

Labels: Faith, Family History, History, scripture