July 13, 2005

Am I Going the Wrong Way?

Fork in the road SR62 E to Eureka Springs AR

I found myself Sunday saying that over and over again. I have been back and forth to and around Holiday Island at least a bazillion times.After all we lived there for six weeks and we go every week to get the mail. But I got really lost sunday, Like... "I wasn't in touch with reality" sort of lost... doesnt happen often as I buzz around... But it seems to happen a lot more here in Arkansas.

Maybe its growing up in a place where there are signs clearly marking the roads. Its not confusing to me, driving the LA freeways, just watch for the signs... no confusing route number this, or off ramp number such and so, just take the 405 north to the 605 north to the 105 west get off at Sepulveda your there...( to anyone reading if you know where you are in LA at this point in the directions, comment and you get the prize.) ...the biggest problem in LA are the antique Spanish names for the streets, Hawaii is worse as all street must have Hawaiian names...and you all wonder how my Hawaiian got so good?)The Big Islands saving grace was that it was a island eventually you could keep driving untill you got back to where you started it would take about 12 hours, barring incedents or accidents... or falling down a ravine...

Anyway if you are east of the Rockies you know the problem. They give three different roads the same name... so confusing. And there are no blessed landmarks, Just beautiful green trees, miles of them.

Many a passenger...(back seat driver)has accused me of going the wrong way at times. Like a man, when I am out on the highway, I KNOW where I am, its dangerous to go up to a gas station attendent and ask for directions. He could send you to his place and you could get axed murdered. When I was wandering in missouri a few days ago and I sauntered in and bought the map, the man behind the counter knew what was up and he was cool about it. He would never ask for directions...

Fortunatly I do listen to advice, process it and make informed decisions, that is the feminine side of my navagational process. So when I was driving up to Eureka Springs and later preparing to leave and folks said , get off the mountain by dark, I scooted, there was flash flooding up there that I didnt need to be involved in...

But I do get turned around a lot and its going to take a while I suppose to get used to seeing the trees from the forests

I think thats true of life in general here. Im taking things slow, not rushing into relationships or things like that. I dont want to go the wrong way with people either.

I am delving into new areas regarding my spirtual life as well. I have been a student of European History for much of my life and intertwined into that story is the Catholic Church, both Latin Rite and Eastern Orthodox. I feel that my education is woefully lacking in this area so insted of watching horrible news I am watching EWTN, the Catholic Cable network and I have been gathering up ideas to ponder, titles of books to read, and such. Already using the Shorter Morning and Evening Benedictine Praybook for devotions, I am learning a lot about a more formal sacramental form of Christianity. Interestingly enough I am finding more similarities than contradictions. Yes, there are issues that I dont understand and doctrines I will likely never agree to, but it is a interesting journey for this once neopagan,now Born Again Bible pounding fire baptized Bapticostal...

Woody, my ever loveing backseatdriver is saying little, but sometimes I think hes a little concerned, and when I try to dialougue, he will fling out a talking point that is boound to conflict... "Now what about Mary?" he say... My response to this one was "Mother of God, yes, Co-Redemptrix, no" and drop it. He doesnt get into the front seat and say, hey I want to drive now..., let me be the spiritual leader in our home, which I would support....To me its all about Jesus, the rest is not worth arguing about. Woody dont worry, I havent changed direction just learning about new stuff...

He's in the back seat still, worried that I am going the wrong way...