July 31, 2004

Will Wonders Never Cease

Observe...The Furry Homewreckers... Note that Makoa is using his little wife Kanani as a pillow, just like a man, and who is posing and who is sleeping??? and they are camped in their fave sleeping spot the middle of our bed...Hey four's company! Purr Purr!
(you all are in BIG trouble, the doting mama can now publish baby snaps anytime she wants, in fits of sappy pictoral blogoterrorism) See post below for details

Menagerie a trois

I saw this and thought it was wacky enough for a laugh or two. I had three people in the store today all friends and I asked them..."OK its_____or the dog/cat...who stays?" A whopping two out of three said that the pet stays...Thats got to say something about the state of mariage for sure...

In our house...well of course. We know who is in charge...the furry children are. We are indulgent pet parents just like everyone else... but who wouldnt be when you have the lovely Nani racing to greet you and Makoa the majestic rubbing the paint off the wall with his cheek purring so loud that you can hear him across the street, as you trudge in from a hard day at the dump/store...Woody flat out said that if we got divorced he'd fight tooth and nail for them and I think I would do the same...I guess we have to stay together for the sake of the children...

Do they get in the way of our relationship? No more than anything else does, the bills, the state of the lawn, and my stress level over the store and our wonderful (not) neighbors. I think Id best be reading yesterdays post again on hostility, while you laugh over the new one below!

Menagerie a trois or
How to handle a jealous pet

By Sandy Robins
MSNBC contributor

For Nancy Golden of Bedford, Mass., life was good. She was a successful business executive with a beautiful apartment and a doting feline soulmate named C.G., who enthusiastically welcomed her home from the office each evening and shared her bed.
advertisementdocument.write And then life got even better. Golden met and married Jim Storms, the man of her dreams. But the moment they all moved in together, Golden, who now goes by her married name of Storms, found herself embroiled in an unusual menage a trois with her husband and the cat.
C.G. would wake Jim up by screaming at him nose to nose, much like a baseball manager yelling at an umpire after a bad call against a player. She also cried constantly, refused to eat and would glare at the couple in disgust when they tried to be intimate.
C.G. felt she was being displaced and was obviously unhappy. It was very upsetting, recalls Storms. I took her to various doctors and even tried to get her a cat companion, but that didn’t work either.
Animals do manipulateEnter animal behaviorist Dr. Nicholas H. Dodman, director of the Animal Behavior Clinic at Tufts University in Grafton, Mass., and author of several books including, If Only They Could Speak.
Animals do manipulate, says Dodman. They are capable of attention-seeking behaviors, knowing the results will alter their owner’s conduct for their benefit. So it’s not unusual for a menage a trois involving the family pet to go awry.
And pets can have a serious impact on a relationship. Seventy percent of people asked to choose between their spouse and their dog will choose the dog, he adds.
Animal intelligence, emotions and self-awareness have always been highly controversial subjects, with many experts disagreeing over the degree to which animals can feel. Dodman firmly believes animals are thinking, attentive beings capable of complicated emotions such as jealousy and guilt.
C.G. made it very clear that she considered Jim an intrusion, says Dodman. She had a very pushy personality and jealously wanted Nancy’s undivided attention.
In these situations, Dodman describes his role of animal behaviorist as a combination of three things: first, a family counselor, sorting out the family dynamics that involve the pet; second, a psychologist, treating the disturbance using behavioral modification techniques; and third, a veterinary physiatrist, prescribing mood altering medication and dealing with underlying medical problems that may be fueling behavioral issues.

Prozac for pets?

While some veterinarians and behaviorists may consider the use of psychotropic drugs for animals unnecessary and trendy, Dodman believes that without these new treatments there would be an even greater number of animals relinquished to shelters and ultimately put to sleep.
People think of Prozac as cosmetic pharmacology. I don’t give it to dogs and cats so that they are good at cocktail parties or to boost their self-esteem, says Dodman. Drugs such as Prozac are best thought of as mood stabilizers. They can be used short term to get a pet around a sharp corner, or more or less indefinitely.
And Prozac definitely had a positive effect on C.G. After beginning treatment with the drug, she mellowed out and became less aggressive toward Jim.

People most often to blame

The dynamic between an owner and a pet plays a key role in the development of bad behavior after the arrival of a significant other, says Dodman.
They feed off each other in a number of ways. Storms own background and the fact that she was emotionally overwrought probably fueled the situation. Someone else may have told the cat to take a hike and get over it, but she got down on her hands and knees and the cat obviously enjoyed the attention, says Dodman.
New York-based psychologist and psychoanalyst Dr. Joel Gavriele-Gold, author of When Pets Come Between Partners, agrees that often people are a major contributing factor to a human-pet-human triangle.
I see this situation a lot. When pets become entangled in human relationships, invariably the animal is a catalyst for bringing out unresolved psychological issues, says Gavriele-Gold. People tend to dump their own personal issues on their pets and the animals wind up looking as if they’re the problem when theyre not.
Gavriele-Gold tells the story of female client who had a boa constrictor named Crunch and went through various boyfriends over the years. Often she and her boyfriend at the time would end up in the bathtub together and the snake would slither down the shower curtain, surprising the unsuspecting suitor. On more than one occasion, she was forced to call the paramedics to prevent the man from going into cardiac arrest.
Finally, Gavriele-Gold says, I got her to understand that she had a fear of commitment and this was her way of keeping a distance in her relationships. Ultimately, she met a guy who loved snakes and they rode off into the sunset together.

A sign of deeper problems

The topic of whether a pet is the pawn or the problem in these situations was also highlighted by Dr. Phil, America’s favorite living-room therapist, late last year when a newly married couple appeared on his show claiming that the wifes daughter was highly allergic to the new husband’s cats.
The husband said the felines had never been a problem when the couple was dating and, furthermore, hed made every effort to contain them to a specific section of their home. The wife questioned Dr. Phil as to whether he thought she was being selfish in asking her husband to get rid of the cats.
If its a health issue that puts your daughter in jeopardy, it isn’t even a close call, said Dr. Phil. Youve got to do something responsible with the cats. However, if you are resenting that he pampers the cats and not you, that is an emotional and not a cat issue. You’ve got to deconstruct this and find out what the real issue is.
Often when people are starting a relationship and one demands that the cat or dog must go, this is only the beginning of issues that are going to get much worse in other parts of the relationship, says Gavriele-Gold.
While the key issues that drive personal relationships all play out in human-pet-human triangles, Gavriele-Gold says that control freaks are one of the biggest problems he encounters.
Watch out, he cautions, for someone who doesn’t own a pet, or who owns one that doesn’t shed. And beware of someone who doesn’t keep plants unless they are cacti.

Compatible pets

And what happens when two people each bring their own pets to a relationship? How do you know if they will be compatible in a joint household?
Rachael Kreisler is president and co-founder of Kissykat.com, an Internet dating site that focuses on matching people who have pets. Kreisler’s three cats first met her future husband’s dog via Web cams set up in their respective households.
Animals can help break the ice when trying to meet new people, says Kreisler. “We have an initial questionnaire that allows people to outline their needs and their pets needs, too.”
When it comes to mixing dogs, people should evaluate the likelihood of success based on the animal's personality rather than breed, says Dodman. There are three characteristics that determine dogs’ interactions with people and other animals: dominance, fear and their prey drive. A dog with a high score for dominance, fear and a heightened prey drive would be a very difficult pet to manage. It would be bossy, in control, frightened of everything and chasing everything in sight.
And, he says, it’s best to mix opposite sexes. But remember that a dog incumbent in a house will need to stay in charge.
Cats should be evaluated for their alertness, sociability and equability. A cat that is active, very sociable and equable is a dog,Dodman jokes.

Or they are our Mak and Nani, the happiest, most social kitties in the blogosphere!

July 30, 2004

Hostility

I read this and realized this was profound. First on a personal level, weather its Woody driving me crazy, or the vagrants hanging out at my store, I need to get a grip on this and remember that they are made in God's image and I do need to think about how I respond to them.

Conversely, as we see the islamists and their culture of hatred and death one can see the singular lack of God's presence in their lives. No one can ever convince me that we will be able to ever get along. This is a social system that uses fear and abuse to control its adherants to its will. A cult of hatred and death so far removed for the Creator and His express will for us... I imagine that the jihadis that thought that they would get paradise and 72 perpetual virgins (my idea of hell for sure) are pretty shocked as they stand at the throne of the Almighty to be judged, then cast into hellfire for it is written "that not everyone that cries Lord! Lord!, shall enter the kingdom of God" It tragic.

The Root of Hostility to Others

By Elisabeth Elliot Gren
When personal relationships break down, it is a sure sign that there is some rift in one's relationship with God. The deeper the rift, the broader will be the effect on the human level. Rebellion against our Creator and Redeemer--against the One who designed us and gives us the breath of life and loves us every minute of every day--is not only unreasonable but outrageous. The sense of outrage will reveal itself in our treatment of others.
We "get at" God by getting at those He has made, especially those whom his providence has placed close to us. We cannot bear the image of God in them, for we cannot bear the ineradicability of that image in our own being. It is a constant reminder of our own sin, which is the violation of the divine image. Without the consciousness of a legitimate claim on our lives, we could not know sin.
To recognize and submit to that claim is to return to peace and fellowship.
"If we claim to be sharing in his life while we walk in the dark, our words and our lives are a lie; but if we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, then we share together a common life, and we are being cleansed from every sin by the blood of Jesus His Son" (l Jn 1:6,7 NEB).

The Stryker Bragade

 Stryking display in Hilo today
By KARIN STANTON WAIMEA --
Big Island residents are getting a first look this weekend at the eight-wheeled armored assault vehicles at the heart of the Army's transformation of its Hawaii-based 25th Infantry Division (Light) into a Stryker Brigade.Two of the Stryker vehicles were on display Saturday at Kohala-Waimea Airport, not far from the Army's Pohakuloa Training Area where the vehicles will train after being phased in on Oahu in 2006.Today they'll be displayed from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. at the Hawaii Army National Guard's helicopter hangars near the Hilo airport.
 
With the 20-ton armored vehicles will be about a dozen soldiers to talk about them, Marine veteran Michael Okunami of Honokaa said he was impressed."It's very solid," he said. "I'm glad they have something like this. Go for it."
 
The Stryker Brigade is key to the Pentagon's goal of making the Army a quicker, more versatile force. Hawaii's brigade of 291 Stryker vehicles would be the fifth of six planned nationwide.The eight-wheeled vehicles can carry up to nine troops and travel faster than 60 mph, meaning troops have the advantage of arriving at a combat area faster than in a traditional armored tank.The vehicles on display Saturday stretched 22 feet in length and stood nine feet high -- about two feet wider, eight feet longer and seven times heavier than the Hummer H-2 commercial sport utility vehicle.The Stryker made no more noise than an average pickup truck, and there was no visible exhaust."It's awesome," said Sgt. Benjamin Herman of the Fort Lewis, Wash.-based 3rd Stryker Brigade Combat Team, who spent eight months with the Stryker team in Mosul, Iraq. "It's saved a ton of guys' lives. We can ride right up to the bad guys' front door without them even hearing."
 
Although most of the three dozen Big Island residents who saw the Stryker on Saturday said they were impressed, at least one disagreed.Lynn Nakkim, who said she represented several groups opposed to basing a Stryker Brigade in Hawaii, said the military has other, more remote areas it can utilize, and should be sensitive to the environmental impacts on the Big Island."Hawaii isn't big enough for a Stryker unit. It's just not suitable," she said. "It's right in our yard, our front yard and too close to the Kohala Coast resorts. If you were on your honeymoon and spending $500 a night, would you want to have war games going on while you sat on a balcony looking out at the moon and the stars?"Wearing a T-shirt printed with the words "Axles of Evil," Nakkim said she was not being unpatriotic, but she still was angry. "This is not a done deal," she said.Army spokeswoman Capt. Kathy Turner said officials wanted to give Hawaii residents an opportunity to see the vehicles and to meet some of the troops to ease some of environmental and cultural concerns that the Strykers will cause more air and noise pollution and inflict irreparable damage to the land."We want the community to touch, see and hear these vehicles," she said. "We want to show the community that this is a work in progress."

As you all know, I am as supportive of the military as one can be, Still I was sympathetic to the concerns of the lady in the article. These things are big and fast. Imagine one of these running around and shooting rounds in your backyard... Not so good. Plus they do damage the gound. We already struggle with ATV and other vehicles being ridden off road and scaring the landscape with trails....

I wonder if this is the best place for this unit or if Senator Inoyue was just trying to shove more pork down Hawaii's gullett. Heaven know that we get enough of it.  

 

July 29, 2004

Hilo Sunshine

Well, we have had weeks and weeks of lovely sunny weather. We had some Hilo Sunshine today, for the first time in weeks it rained during the day and quite hard too. Must have been the curise ship in port. We had the hottest July days ever last friday and saturday was in the mid 90's, that is scorching for Hilo....

Stay tuned to MWBS, as there are changes afoot and you will be able to see some of the lovely pics I have been taking lately.

Woody has had some excitement. He was offered a new job at of all places the check cashing place that went in where Woody and I wanted to put our store back in January (see the post on the 10th). We were excited because even though the job only paid half of what it should and would make life a lot harder for me at the store, it would have gotten Woody back to working on the Hilo side and the money saved in expenses would have made a huge difference. Well...

It wasnt ment to be. Woody went to sign his papers and he noticed a few odd things, like no security cameras, not other person would be there but him. No safe, the money was in a desk drawer. Woody, knowing about my tour of duty at a major Credit Union and all the security we have at the store started to ask a lot of questions...like "do you have robbery proceedures in place?" What happens if money goes missing? Do I get my own alarm pass code? the answer to all of those questions was "No". When he was asked about the parent company in Honolulu that was doing the hiring, the man laughed and admitted that he was the parent company, just him. "So I get held up and shot dead, no one will see, no one will know how it happened. So I say we have a few thousand in the drawer and you came in and say its missing, its my word against your and we go to court? the guy said "yes" In fact we have learned that there is litgation against the former manager of this "business". $7000.00 turned up missing and the former manager flat out denies taking it. I think Mr. so and so, snuck in and pinched it himself, that was my first thought. You see Woody didnt think up those questions? Mrs "dont trust nobody" did, cause I know the evil that men do and frankly this is got to be a money washing drug dealing set up...

Disapointed...yes... but happy to not be in that situation, Woody went to Kona and is glad for his honest if somewhat to too great job.

I will be ordering my equipment in a few days, once my check for my 401k shows up. I really want to get started on my work as a goldsmith. I am so looking forward to it.

My mother is doing ok, we had an interesting discussion this past weekend. Seems that she thinks that she should just get a transfere to the affilliated nursing home here in Hilo. She is "getting encouragement to do this". From Whom? I dont know. The home is question is currently under investigation for abuse, neglect really as its a staffing issue but no new paitents are being admitted and here in Hawaii you cannot get 100% paid care if you have relatives here that "can help" what ever that means and I think it means different things to different judges....We also have a residency policy that helps kama'aina get their ill family members in ahead of newbees that want to retire and bring Mom and Dad and plunk them into a home on the state of Hawaii's largesse. I told her no and to not even think about it. It was really hard because I could hear the disapointment and dismay. She really thought that it was possible and had been waiting to spring this idea on me till she thought that the time was right. She would have to live here with us for two years...the thought of being trapped here with another person 24/7 for two years is enough to make me want to drive off a cliff... I am such a solitary animal. Let alone all of the care involved. Woody forbid it and said if it comes up again hed call the nursing home and straighten everyone out... I think its not just the nursing home I think its a well meaning person in her life either her friends or a relative... but I am not sure that its not just a fantasy of hers either... I think that her life is a living hell at least it would be to me. Sorry if that sounds harsh to some... I know in my heart that I dont have it in me...

the little fuzzballs this is a test 

July 28, 2004

"What Is Your Location"

I had five different visitors comment on this mornings story in the Trib about the need for residential address identification on our homes and businesses. So I though that it was a good tie in to the story from yesterday
 
Addresses soon to be law
 
By JASON ARMSTRONG
 
 All building owners need a number so they don't become a statistic. A street address must be displayed on every Big Island home and business under a new law that takes effect Aug. 14.The owners of permitted or occupied structures will have a one-year grace period before they must post the numbers or face a $25 fine.
 
In the 15 months since the legislation was proposed, the estimated number of existing homes lacking an assigned address has dropped from 20,000 to 2,300, according to the county. The county assigns an address when it issues a building permit, ensuring new structures have numbers.The goal is to increase response times by police, fire and other emergency personnel."At night, you can no longer go to the house with the light on because they're all on," Fire Chief Darryl Oliveira said.Besides offering faster emergency care, the new law also will make it easier for mail carriers, shippers and delivery drivers to find their destinations, he said."I mean everybody can benefit from at least having some reference points to work with," Oliveira said.Complying with the law helps property owners by making them safer, said Police Sgt. Derek Pacheco, commander of the Puna District."I think it will make an impact here," Pacheco said. "Being a rural area, a lot of times we have to get directions to the house because there is no street address."Those directions are sometimes wrong or unclear, and having a dispatcher verify the information can take precious seconds, he said.
 
Under the law, single-family homeowners must post an address near their driveway entrance by mounting the numbers on their mailbox, post or fence. The address may be placed near the home's main entrance if it is within 50 feet of the road or is clearly visible from there.If the dwelling entrance is more than 50 feet from the street or cannot be seen easily from there, a second set of numbers must be mounted on, above or at the side of the entrance.The address must be visible while driving in either direction.Owners sharing a common driveway have to display the range of addresses on a sign of up to 2 square feet and not more than 6 feet high.Just one posting is required for businesses, either at the driveway entrance or on the building if the structure is located within 50 feet of the street.Business owners, however, must use taller numbers that are at least 4 inches high.In an effort to avoid confusion, no other words or numbers may be placed within two feet of the address number, according to the law.People who deface or remove an address can be fined up to $500 for the first offense and between $500 and $1,000 for a subsequent conviction occurring within five years.The Planning Department is responsible for enforcing the law.

I love this...Here are the directions for getting your very own address?

1. Identify your property's unique tax-map-key number, or TMK. Check your recent real property tax assessment card to learn the TMK or look it up on the Web at www.hawaiipropertytax.com.
 
 
2. Call 961-8469 and ask for the Street Address Section of the Hawaii County Planning Department.
 
 
3. Provide your TMK to the clerk. Also state the number of homes on your lot and if your driveway is located on the left, middle or right side of the lot.

 
4. Receive a free address assignment.Note: Property owners are responsible for the cost of obtaining and mounting their address numbers. They must be Arabic numerals at least 3 inches tall for homes and a minimum 4 inches high for businesses. The numbers should be made from a durable and clearly visible material or paint that is a different color from the background.

I have had to deal with this myself. I worked for three miserable months for a cinder and gravel company in Pahoa two summers ago, and I would get orders from customers wanting gravel delivered to a job site or home and they would give direction's like these...

"Yah, go down Hwy 130 till you get to Pakalolo Rd, turn then go quite a ways up you know where it goes yah? (no...but I digress) No? Well it goes way up no road just dirt  then when you get to the place when it forks go "mauka" (towards the mountain... and there are several to choose from) you will run into a sorta paved scrape road, follow that(I assume mauka, but you know what assume is short for?) till you see the gate with the orange rag tied to it (I kid you not) Turn in and you will see the place where its dump already..."

Or this one..."Yah I likea live out Hawaiian Acres, you know off road "E", then follow the telephone poles 10 or so to the gate with the yellow police tape...Yah we got raided, so I kept the tape... Put it on the gate so we could be found again yah... We gotta bunch of trees near us (so does everyone else, its a forest...) and if you hit 14th you have gone too far.."

Trouble is all the street signs are painted on telephone poles out there. There are no street lights and most people are on a temporary power pole or off the grid. At night it is BLACK out that way and you dont want to be roaming around in the dark...None of those people have a street address. Trust me, a lot of them dont want a street address ( can you spell Pakalolo? Marijuana to the rest of us) We get our mail via the post office box. And when there is a reason that they need to be found its darn hard.

This is important. Its a measure of the growth that I have written about lately. But like many have said it shows that the country type of living that the old timers had once, is gone forever and while progress is good, there was a bit of good in the old ways too.  

July 27, 2004

Land Grab

Oh the pain of progress... on the blog Texas Trifles, The Trailboss Cowtown Pattie wrote a great post on the effects of NAFTA in the West Texas area. I know that progress is good and ineveitable for if you are not growing you are dying right?

Here on the Big Island, as well as Kauaii,  we are in the midst of a growth spurt that is unprecedented in the history of the Islands. Huge tracts of sugar land have been sold or made available for sale in the past two years that has created a land rush the likes of which hasnt been seen here ever. Houses are going up like crazy. Land values are escalating at 5% per month. In prime areas like Central Oahu and the North Shore, Kauaii, and West Hawaii near Kailua Kona on the Big Island its more like 10% per month. I saw a statistic, Im not sure where now, that 25 families per day are resetting on the Big Island. They are bring the big money made from land deals on the mainland, (like we did, the cash sale of two homes that were mostly paid off) and plunking this down on mansions that are being built.

Understand that while this is a huge Island, big chunks of it are not inhabitable, due to the volcanoes and land instability, ore the land is a part of the "Sceeded Lands" and not for sale ever as the belong to the Hawaiians ie the State who is grudgingly giving it out a bit at a time. Then there is Bishop Estate land that is also royal lands that are a part of a trust. Many resorts and hotels are on this land and pay a lease payment to the trust. Really, the available land for sale is very limited and that creates a value that canot be denied.

It also creates greed and envy. Consider this story. A family has purchased a prime piece of land... except when it was bought it was in the worst area, in the center of a drug infested town,  in East Hawaii. Now its in a very sought after location as redevelopement is going on. They made a huge investment in developing the property and can prove this, They are collecting rents on it. Now the island wants to condemn this parking lot and give the family only a third of the asking price which I believe that they will eventually get for it if it can be left on the market. Yes Downtown Pahoa needs the lot but they should pay this lady, who has fought them tooth and nail only since she put her money into this development project. But when it was ungraded and not pretty she offered to sell it and no one wanted it. I know this woman as she is a customer of the shop and is fair minded if a bit eccentric, nothing new for this island full of independent free spirits...

 

Sunday, Jul 25, 2004
 
County sets sights on Pahoa land
By JASON ARMSTRONG
 
Hawaii County will buy Pahoa's Akebono Theater parking lot for public parking and other improvements, but only if it can get the 3.2-acres of land for $500,000 or less. That's the spending cap the County Council placed on the property Friday when members approved using the government's power of eminent domain to obtain the land."It's still true that (landowner Monika Mallick) opposes having her property condemned," Will Rosdil, Mallick's attorney, told lawmakers prior to the vote. Mallick, who did not attend the meeting, acquired four vacant parcels totaling 3.8 acres from her mother for $100,000 in 2002, according to county tax records. Mallick told the Tribune-Herald that she has since spent nearly $400,000 clearing it, doing grading work and other landscaping.The county values the land at $301,000 for tax purposes, while its appraiser last November determined it is worth $275,000. The county earlier this year made three offers to buy the land, the last of which was for $450,000. Mallick refused each offer and has the property listed for sale at $1.5 million. Unable to buy the land, the council is using its power to condemn it under a process that involves a judge setting the fair market value. Lawmakers voted Friday to seek only three of Mallick's parcels totaling 3.2 acres since a roughly half-acre parcel, which they originally wanted, is not connected to Mallick's other three. Mallick is very comfortable letting the court set the land's worth and is willing to discuss a land swap or having the county condemn only a portion, Rosdil said.That position prompted Hilo Councilman Mike Tulang and Hamakua Councilman Fred Holschuh to change their earlier votes and agree to support the condemnation. The lone opposing vote was cast by North Kona Councilman Curtis Tyler, who voiced reservations after learning that Mallick will be barred from selling her land once the county files a lawsuit to seize it. The county plans to use the property for a "Pahoa Village Resource Park." The project will include a paved parking lot, public bathroom and information kiosk that will double as a mini-police station. The county will pay for the improvements with what is left from the $1.25 million earmarked for the project. Puna Councilman Gary Safarik, who introduced the eminent domain resolution, suggested the development costs will be $750,000.Safarik said he called for capping the purchase amount at $500,000 to leave enough money to pay for the improvements.

 
Sunday, Jul 25, 2004
 
Family has purchased thousands of acres on the Big Isle in past 2 years

By DAVE SMITH
 
The family that owns a downtown Pahoa parking lot the county intends to acquire has invested in a variety of Big Island real estate. Monika Mallick is resisting county efforts to condemn 3.2 acres fronting the Akebono Theater that she acquired two years ago from her mother, Theodora Mallick. But the Pahoa property is but a drop in the bucket that holds more than 50 properties the Mallicks have purchased around the island. Records on file with the county real property tax office show that the Mallicks have invested more than $10 million in Big Island real estate. Most of those purchases, which total more than 2,000 acres, have come in the past two years. All of the properties are registered to the address of the Century Wilshire Hotel in Los Angeles, a 99-room hotel near the UCLA campus which Theodora Mallick has owned for 30 years. Mallick, who is also known as Asha, said she previously lived for 20 years in La Jolla, Calif., before deciding to become a part-time resident of the Big Island. She still has ventures elsewhere, including one recent proposal to help build a hotel in the San Diego, Calif., area. The Big Island properties registered to Mallick and daughters Monika and Geeta range from hundreds of acres of former plantation land in Pepeekeo and Ka'u, to homes in Hilo and Papaikou, to a $1.75 million lot in Puako. Mallick maintains she is not driven by speculation and that her purchases are for her family's future benefit."I'm not buying it to flip it," she said. "I have never sold anything."She said the Pahoa parking lot, which is on the market, is an exception. The Mallicks have said that they purchased the property to prevent the closing of the Pahoa farmer's market. The market is now operating under the supervision of Salvador Luquin, who owns the nearby Luquin's Mexican Restaurant and leases the parking lot property for $3,000 a month."In fact, we had no plans to sell land in Pahoa," she said, adding she had wanted to create a "town-square concept" on the property."We'd like to help everybody," Mallick said. "I hope the council sees it that way."Last year, Theodora Mallick offered to build a new Pahoa school gym on five acres she owns nearby for a "turn-key" sale to the state. That deal apparently fell through. Mallick's purchases have included several hundred acres of former C. Brewer land near the old Hilo Coast Processing Co. She has joined Hawaiian Rainbows LLC which plans to sell 20-acre agricultural lots near the former Pepeekeo sugar mill.Mallick said she does not plan to sell her Pepeekeo properties and her participation in the project involves providing fruit trees from her nursery.She plans to continue her fruit tree operation, including macadamia nut orchards. Last year she received an award from the Hamakua Soil and Water Conservation District for her land stewardship practices. Mallick said she and the Big Island are a good fit."I'm happy here," she said. "It's a wonderful place."

I dont understand why they would run the two stories together except that the envious locals think that she should just give the property away as she has so much already. Stealing is stealing. They are trying to steal this lady's land and its wrong... What do you all think?   

July 25, 2004

Spiritual Equilibrium

Again my thanks to Elizabeth Elliot for this thought on the power of hope and desire

Spiritual Equilibrium

Sometimes a hope or desire lays hold on one with such power that it becomes almost burdensome, even though the thing is a delight to contemplate. The ordinary business of life must be attended to, but this thing carries a lot of weight in soul, mind, and heart. It has a strong pull. And when you are carrying a heavy weight, you have to compensate in order to keep your balance. The best means to spiritual equilibrium, I find, is to look repeatedly at the things which are not seen, that is, at things which are eternal. What Evelyn Underhill calls "the pressure of the Divine Charity" forever urges me forward, counteracting the pressure of my emotions and human desires, reminding me with great patience and great persistence that this thing--this love, this longing, this huge desire--is the very thing God Himself gave, in order that I might have "something to offer." He will see to it that it does not come to nothing, provided we lay it before Him, put it at his disposal.

Lord, all that I long for is known to you,

my sighing is no secret from you...

I put my trust in you, Yahweh,

and leave you to answer for me, Lord my God.

(Ps 38:9, 15 JB)

I need to leave all of my hopes and desires at the foot of His cross... that is where He wants me to leave them and the weight of them... every one of them. I cannot put my trust in anything less, certainly not my feeble efforts. I know that the Very One that gave me the will and desire to accomplish the task will provide the means to do so in His time.

This Week's Saturday Slant Week 19 Year 2

My favorite 80s culture moment is....Was it the debut of MTV? Is your favorite moment patriotic pride in Mary Lou Rettons 1984 Olympic gold medal win? Was it Samantha Foxs ass-less leather pants? Was it David Lee Roths ass-less leather pants? Does "Sixteen Candles" qualify as your favorite Eighties moment? Or was it that special someone with whom you saw "Dirty Dancing"? We know you were there. Spill it!

 Ah Pariah..."Sweet Dreams are made of this..." Will any of us that came of age in the 80's forget the advent of the MTV style music video? I have to say this, music videos had been out for about 10 years prior to that. They were a natural extension of the prerecorded music shorts that had been on tv for a long time, but MTV, and the video for the sake of the video changed everything about how pop and other music was packaged and sold. I remember seeing some of the first ones then going back to class and saying "This is big, and going to get bigger..."and it did.

However I think that MTV has run its course. Much of what is produced is vile, beyond anything necessary to prove any pointor sell any artist. However Mark Romenek's stunning video of Johnny Cash,  "Hurt" gives me hope that this art form wont just become another form of pornography...

The the things that came to mind right away for me when I read the question were.... Duran Duran- I can hear "Rio" in my head...-overlaid with Culture Club, Phil Collins, Eurythmics, Pretenders, Blondie (hey I hear they are back???) and Madonna, who I remember seeing in "Desperately Seeking Susan" and saying to my now ex husband, "OMG, this is only the beginning, shes terrific... " ....I was working at a firm that had the largest warehousing operations in the area and one portion was used as a sound stage quite often for movies, ect. We got to see some of the production for Michael Jackson's Video, "Thriller"... I remember seeing that and saying "Wow, how do you top that?" You dont...and he didnt and its sad to see how Jackson's life is so sick and sad. Dancing Rain Girl as Rock and Roll prophet...lol

I don't know if this qualifies as a cultural moment, but by the mid 80.s the club scene in Greater Los Angeles was the most intense it had been in years... I think that had a great impact on local media at the time as well what was going on in music and film. Along with that "action" was the other "action", huge huge drug scene, cocaine everywhere,  a lot of wild sexual excess, Open parties where anything goes...The now Governor of California, Arnold Schwarzenegger, eluded to some of this during his campaign when he was rightly accused of misconduct at some of these "events" (and other things too, it was a mind set then, do what ever, worry about the consequences later)..., well he wasn't the only one, there was a of wild stuff going on...The Gay Culture was, to use a cliche, "coming out" and we had a lot of gay friends that we met and hung with...We also had gay friends that were dying of AIDS and no one really understood what that was all about,except for the furnerals and asking why?.(AIDS as a 80's cultural event ,Yes...) My Ex and I would walk Hollywood boulevard, in our leathers, and watch the freak show, and we hit a few of those little events.. I don't regret one bit getting out of it and totally away from that life, It nearly killed me. I find myself thinking "I did what?" and there were the people that would just appere back into my life like a bad dream... As for the night life, there wasn't much happening until a  few years ago, where the RAVE thing took hold...Things always come back around... 

July 24, 2004

If You think Its Safe to Fly...

Think again. Thank you, Smoothstone , for bringing this to our attention, cause its not in the news for sure, Not even Rush Limbaugh was on top of this one. In this horrifying article we are taken on a plane ride from hell, Courtesy of Annie Jacobson and the editors of the e-Zine WomensWallStreet.com . As we receive the watered down 911 Omission (not Commission) report, we can see from reading this article that we have a really long long way to go before we can be safe in the Skies again.

I believe in Civil Liberties, but not for foreigners and not for criminals, These men mentioned in the article couldnt be legally searched for fear of violating laws, lets get those laws changed soon before we see more planes used as WMDs, and thousands more die.

When the islamists can be good citizens as well as good muslims then we will have peace, but that will never happen. They are bent on the overthrow of our government and the destruction of our way of life. Therefore they, when acting in a suspicious manner, should be scrutinized and treated as enemies of the state if need be, and arrested. These men in the article should never have been allowed to behave like this. What could have happened is a riot on the plane or a panic and then you have death for no reason.None of this shold have been allowed to go so far and I hope that rules are tightened so we dont have another attack on our country,

Better to be doing it soon, as the enemy seems to have an upper hand at present.

July 22, 2004

Dog Days

Its the Dog Days of summer. In the natural world, this moniker for the hottest part of the summer was coined because this is the time that the star, Sirius, is most visible. Known as the Dog Star, it can be clearly seen near the constellation Orion in the Northern Sky. It is one of the Hoku  or stars in Hawaiian, that were mentioned in their mythology, These Hokulea or Stars of Gladness fortold of events that would have significance to the people, or were for navigation...

In the jewelry biz, the Dog Days of summer have a whole different meaning. Your Dogs are all the pieces of jewelry that you ordered for last holiday that didn’t sell. You can hear them barking at you as they sit in the case, unlonged for and unloved. I am fortunate that I don’t have a lot of these sitting around. I have moved a lot of my inventory and many of the older pieces are classics that will sell in time. The last thing that I want to do is to have a big blow out sale and get rid of a lot of stock at a foolishly low price, but on the other hand the stuff just sitting here is doing me no good and its best to find the puppies a good home so to speak.

Its so dreadfully slow that you can hear the electric meter whirring up and no sales to cover the bill. The other merchants on the street feel the same way, Please, God send some customers to relieve the awful boredom!

Woody has been having trouble at his job. The lady that does the scheduling is a incompetent and a ninny on top of it. She has been known to call for Woody here at the store and she has to know that he is on his post on the other side of the island. She called Woody at home on 7-19, wanting to know where he was? He was home. Hed just pulled down four days and was to be off. Turned out that he was booked to work 9 days straight and wasn’t told. For some reason she cant comprehend that Woody working over there requires a bit of effort. Like money for food, a hotel room and the money to pay for it. She doent get it. She thinks he should just come over and if he cant eat or has to sleep in his car, tough.  You have to be flexible, is the word. I think hes just about had it with this whole thing and who can blame him? I understand that I wish I cauld do something about this but its not possible and I have to sit and wait this season out and it hurts.

I cashed out my 401k today. Yes, I know about the penalties and all but this is the last little bit of money I have…and it’s the only way I can get the equipment in to start learning the repair stuff. Woody is sad about it too, but this is all I can do.

I feel a despair that threatens to overwhelm me. I am clinging to God, and praying for an end to the financial drought here.

July 21, 2004

What Did He Say??? the New Techno-Speak

I love language. I began to talk at 7 months and was reading food lables at the market before I was 2. Unfortunatly I do have some difficulties and never learned to spell... or maybe its too much "Hooked On Phonics" As I spent time with my Dad I learned all the engineering jargon of the pencil, ink and mylar drafting suite as well as what was called then "NASA-speak..."From my Mother, music speak, Cuban speak, and the King James Bible, which has had a great influence on my writing and speaking.

Well " speak" of all kinds has always been around... its the verbal shorthand of trades, lifestyles even churches and organizations. Families have "speak" and we know that teens have "speak"of their own. The verbal short hand sometimes makes it into the popular lexicon, and I think that is nowhere more obvious than the computer-internet-techno-speak that we all use everyday.

So I found this article interesting as I have used variations of some of these and wonder if my variation is the mother or the child of these words and phrases...

25 Hot Buzzwords

Kate Lorenz, CareerBuilder.com Editor  

Have you ever attended a presentation that sounded impressive, but left you wondering what it all meant? Have you marveled at a colleague's ability to deliver a discourse consisting entirely of recycled phrases that sound brilliant but say nothing? Want to wow a potential employer with your "understanding" of today's workplace? Irksome as office buzzwords can be, you've got to admit the ability to string them together (while tossing in a few "mission-criticals" and "customer-focuseds" for good measure) is something of an art-form. Even if you don't think you can use them with a straight face, just knowing these buzzwords can come in handy when you want to deflate a pompous consultant, impress a "buzzing" interviewer, mask the absence of substance in a report, or are simply at a loss for words but need to sound authoritative. Corporate jargon and clichés are so pervasive that their use - or abuse - has yielded a buzzword of its own: "Deja Moo" (the feeling you've heard this bull before). Here are 25 of today's most popular buzzwords and euphemisms making the rounds in boardrooms and cubicles everywhere.

Air Cover When a senior manager agrees to take the flak for an unpopular decision, while someone lower in the chain of command does the dirty work. As in: "The CFO will provide air cover, while you reduce staff by half." (A term borrowed from the military.)

Alpha Pup A market research term referring to the "coolest kid in the neighborhood." As in: "If the alpha pups go for it, we'll sell millions of them."

Bleeding Edge Beyond cutting edge. So new, its creators aren't entirely sure where it's headed.

Business Ecosystems When companies in the same markets work cooperatively and competitively to introduce innovations, support new products and serve customers.

Chips and Salsa Refers to computers. Chips = hardware; Salsa= software.

Co-Evolution A theory that a company can create new business, markets and industries by working with direct competitors, customers and suppliers.

Cookie Jar Accounting An accounting practice where a company uses reserves from good years against losses that might be incurred in bad years.

Defenestrate A 17th century word, now back in fashion, that means to throw someone or something out the window. As in: "Let's defenestrate this marketing strategy."

Dial It Back To tone down. As in: "Your sales pitch is too aggressive. Dial it back."

800-Pound Gorilla A company that dominates an industry short of having a complete monopoly.

End-to-End Used largely by technology vendors to imply that whatever they build for one part of your organization will work with whatever they build for another.

Future-Proof To create a product that won't be made obsolete by the next wave of technological advancements.

Ideation Brainstorm session.

Living Document A document intended to be continually revised and updated.

Market Cannibalization When a company's new product negatively affects sales of its existing, related products, i.e., it eats its own market.

Optics How things appear.

Pain Points A favorite of consultants used to describe places where an organization is hurting due to poor operating structure, technology or inefficiencies.

Pockets of Resistance Another borrowed military term that describes a person or group that attempts to stall, block or kill a project.

Reaching Critical Mass Having enough customers or market share to become profitable.

Repurposing Taking content from one medium (books, magazine, etc.) and repackaging it to be used in another medium.

Reverbiagize To reword a proposal with the hope of getting it accepted by people who didn't like it the first time around. As in: "It's the same concept, we've just reverbiagized it."

Tszuj (Pronounced "zhoozh") To tweak, finesse or improve.

Value Stream Six Sigma term that encompasses every step in the process of producing and delivering a product or service (whether it adds value or not).

Value Migration Used in industries where there is little market growth, the term refers to the movement of growth and profit opportunities from one company to another.

White Space Opportunity New high-potential growth possibilities that are related to but don't quite match the capabilities and skills of the organization.

 

Cool  OK ... How many of these can I use in one sentence, or Paragraph?

Due to Value Migration, my organization is suffering from Pain Points and may have to Tszuj, or even Defenstrate its current Co-Evolution and Cookie Jar Accounting, taking into account that my business plan is a Living Document, I can Reverbagize it, refocusing its Optics via Ideation. By Repurposing new White Space Opportuniy, and refining my Value Stream, I can create a new Business Ecosystem, one that by End to End services allows me to create a Future Proof product that will reach Critical Mass, defeating all Pockets of Resistance and the 800 Pound Gorrilla....Whew...

Boy is that a lot of Deja Moo

July 20, 2004

One Small Step for a Man...

Thirty Five years ago today, our world changed, We had, through an effort not seen outside of wartime experience, pushed back the frontiers and landed on another world. It was a monumental achievement, due in large part to the vision of what we now call " The Greatest Generation".  From first flight to space flight in less than a century is flat out amazing. I don't believe we today have the vaguest notion of the blessing and benefits of this effort, nor the staggering costs in money materials and human life and potential that went into the Mercury, Gemini, and Apollo Programs.
 
When I speak of the cost of human life, yes, I do mean the Astronauts that have died in flight and on the ground, but I mostly mean the men and women that worked themselves to death literally to meet a deadline...To win the "Space Race" that really was a real war fought against the Russians, to be the first to the moon and to secure it against the communist threat... This was a very real threat...The very thought that a weapons platform could be built and used to launch nuclear missiles was a real possibility and one of the uses that the Space Shuttle was designed for... But I digress.
 
How do I know all of this... I and my family were a part of the human wreckage left behind. My father, caught up in the vision of this incredible idea that we could send men into space and get them home again safely, was all consuming and for nearly 10 years he devoted his entire life to the research and development phases of the environmental and propulsion systems of these space craft. He ate, slept, and lived for this... And not only him, but thousands of people did. People slept in offices and lounges, had meals for days and days brought in and worked at this war effort with a single mindedness that dot commers in the 90's spoke of with admiration...What was the fruit of this effort, beyond the "one small step for a man..." And the thousands upon thousands of modern conveniences we take for granted each day....
 
On the other hand there were darker realities...
 
At the firm in California where my father worked there were three deaths a week, at least one of those was a suicide....
 
People died, from heart attacks, sleeping drug overdoses, and alcohol abuse... People divorced, relationship deteriorated and fell by the wayside, I remember my fathers secretary coming to our house black and blue from her manager husbands beating, I was four and I shall never forget the haunted look of the disillusioned... She went home the next day to find him dead in his car in the garage, overcome by carbon monoxide poisoning. Children were neglected grew into despondent and angry teens and joined others of their kind in the 60's counter culture, where drugs and the hippie lifestyle were a stark contrast to the white shirt and tie world of NASA and the government/military culture of their parents.
 
My father had many demons, He was a high school grad that worked his way into aero space through the assembly lines at Hughes aircraft. He was driven by many demons. He was an angry man, bent on proving his value to the world. He was also a perfectionist who clung to guilt like a life line. This sort of person is so exploitable... He took on more and more projects. (At the time that he left North American Aviation in 1969, he had 33 end items or projects on his desk. He was replaced by 4 engineers, 4 designers and 3 draftsmen.)This was a profession fraught with problems and possibilities, there were many things that nobody really knew how it was going to turn out. And some things, which we saw in "Apollo 13" that were creative but required reworking... I read a memo that Dad had saved that said, "Call Roberts at Downey R&D, he has the answered to problems that we haven't even thought of yet..."

And sometimes they that called upon his inventiveness listened, and sometimes they did not...He knew that the oxygen enriched atmosphere in the space capsule was a death wish waiting to happen. He was told that it would be looked into and when the fateful day came for that trial run and those poor men burned to death on the pad in front of a stunned helpless group of well meaning but exhausted scientists, it spurred him into a greater frenzy of activity. We never saw him at home...
 
My brother told me once that he didn't know really who our father was until he was 4 or 5 . That was when my mother collapsed and was hospitalized and Dad had to give up the space race for a month and look after us. I remember during that period, one day,  being picked up at school being taken home, dressed in a fancy party dress and being taken to a NASA staff meeting. I remember sitting in the back of the room listing to all of this discussion, then later going the the local watering hole, where I was fussed over and treated like the little princess... Perhaps that is how I developed my taste for older men...
 
Never eating, living on alcohol and sleeping pills, Pushing and pushing himself mentally and physically to meet the demands, then he was told that he needed to "take some time off" and was handed a pink slip. The next day was Landing  and  that fateful afternoon, July 20, 1969...Seeing Neil Armstrong climb down that ladder was a stunning moment...We stared all four of us, at the TV, then I noticed the tears. My father's tears. It was the first time I had ever seen him cry. My mother took us away we went to our rooms and for the next three weeks we were house bound. Drapes drawn and silent as my father collapsed into a mental breakdown that he never recovered from. He attempted suicide, and begged my mother for the pistol that she had secreted away months ago. She never gave out what happened during that event, but I do know that he tore the house up and beat her for the first and only time in 30 years of marriage. The "Long Night" as I call it, ended, when he agreed to enter a mental hospital.  He weighed 125 lbs and was so malnourished and ill that the doctors there said that if they could keep him alive two weeks the could help him.
 
He returned to us two years later, broken in spirit, not the man he was at all, and still a bonafied alcoholic with a drug habit. Unable to work, to cope with any strife or conflict,  or to be a husband or father, he lived with us for 20 more years and died of multiple cancers and arterial sclerosis from smoking...he was 64.  
 
Many people ask me when they find out about my background, "hey, what about Mars?" "What do you think about the Space Station?" I smile and say... "We are not committed enough. We lost two Shuttles for this lack of commitment to the program and they are so outdated technologically that I have my doubts about their future." We have no commitments to the effort as a people or a government. Until the Space program is of national interest, and we are in a position to pay the cost and I do mean all of the costs and the sacrifices needed, we will not see that day. Its a bigger effort than most can comprehend, and for those of us that have paid the price, we are not sure we want to pay it again...



Postscript
 
See this very good article from MSN on this subject

I wrote this on the fly, and I have ajusted some of the data. I also realized that I had more to say...(Thanks Smooth for the Comment)
 
I think that the reason that my father had his breakdown  on the physical he was a dead man walking, he was in such bad shape. Runners doing marathons sometimes just colapse at the finish line and have been semiconcious for a while but keep on running...on the emotional level, I think he felt his life was over. It was all that he had lived for all that gave him value. I never heard him say this, but I think I understand having gone through a similar but less harrowing, experience, that broke my health, and really has damaged my relationships including that with my God. We cannot as humans, use anything outside of the Divine to measure our worth. We are created in His image, and in my faith I believe that He paid the Ultimate price for my eternal security. As far as I can tell, my father paid lip service to his Creator,  never placing his trust in Him, prefering to have faith in alcohol, antidepressants, and my mother's piety to make his way in this world and the next. That is the ultimate tragedy to me...As he lay dying, in a isolation ward, of a rabid infection in a body that wouldnt heal, I held his hand and begged God for mercy. Beyond confession, I dont know what became of him on the eternal level, but as I wrote in a post a few weeks ago, his feeling and mine is that when you love someone and dont forget that love, you never truly die..

July 18, 2004

This Day God Gives Me

This is a hymn for morning worship from the Prayerbook of the Benedictines of St. John's Abbey in Lemon North Dakota. I use this for my devotional reading and prayer. There are some wonderful things written in this volume... wonderful prayers and hymns. For this Baptist raised, fire baptised Pentecostal,Calvary Chapel chourus leading Believer, this ancient poetry is a marvel and I love it so. The next thing I know I will be converting...My poor Mom, that would be the end for her... 
 
I think one day I will become an Oblate of a religous house. There is a Benedictine Abbey on Oahu. Lack of funds prevent me from participating with that congragation as I would have to go once a month to classes and services at this time but one day perhaps...
 
 
 
This day that God gives me
Strength of High Heaven
Sun and moon shining
        Flame in my hearth
 
Flashing of lightning
Wind in its swiftness
Deeps of the Ocean
       Firmness of earth
 
This day my God sends me
Strength as my steersman
His might to uphold me
        His wisdom to guide
 
Your eyes are watchful
Your ears are listening
Your lips are speaking
         Friends at my side
 
God's way is my way
God's shield is around me
God's Hosts will defend me
         Saving from ill
 
Angels of heaven
Drive from me always
All that would harm me
        Stand by me still
 
Rising, I thank You
Mighty and Strong One
King of Creation
       Giver of Rest
 
Firmly confessing
Threeness of persons
Oneness of Godhead
        Trinity blest
 
Amen and Alleluia
 

July 17, 2004

This Week's Saturday Slant Week 18 Year 2

The letter... I have acutally written letters like this as a part of the recovery process. I write letters as a hobby and have since I was 10,  so expressing myself in this form is not difficult. In fact its hard for me to stop once I get started.
 
Ok Pariah, great slant...we are getting interesting with this one...

Dear __________, Im sorry we never __________.
Fill in the blanks, then elaborate.

Good therapy in this... let's do the whole family and get it over with. 
 

Dear Father, Im sorry we never went a day when you weren't drinking and were truly available for us. Its sad that you missed out on being a real dad, because I know that this was what you wanted to be but you couldnt get the demons that tormented you away long enough to... What is the saddest was that YOU didnt have to do that but you could have allowed God to rule and reign in your life and that would have changed you. I know how hard it is to let go and let
God. Thats why you never could admit that you were an alcoholic. I am sorry that you died a slow painfilled death, due to the excesses of your lifestyle. I would to God that things were different, but they cannot be.  
 
Dear Mother, Im sorry that we cannot be honest between us and really discuss how bad things were when we were growing up. Its just too hard for you and now you are beyond discussing anything. When I tried to, it upset you and I felt cruel for trying. As with Dad, the letting go and letting God is critical. The Control Freak mentality rules in your family. I am choosing to not let it rule me. It will destroy me and the life that God has for me and life is just too short for that.
 
Dear Brother. Im sorry that its been nearly three years since we have spoken, but that is how you want it. I know that you are mad at me for moving to Hawaii, but I needed to make this change and get well mentally and physically, and that is it. You could do the same by giving up the bottle, the porno, and the other garbage that is ruining your life. You could then make it right between you and your son and your son's mom. Do you remember when we agreed that we would be the last generation that would go throught this hell... we were not 18 even and we knew that the stuf we had seen our parents do was the worst thing and we were saying no to it. I guess it was too long ago to remember or call to mind. Another era, mate, and lifetime ago.
When I see the chances that you have had, the things that you could have done and that you threw away it makes me sooo mad. You were the smartest of us, and had the greatest gifts. Its tragic that you dont care.....
 

I could go on and on...
 
Dear former husband, that left me for another woman...
Dear love of my life that left me for another guy...
Dear  present husband that perhaps wishes I was perhaps more like his ex wife...no...wont go there...
Dear son that did not live to be born that would be 21 this year... 
Dear Ken... forever solo...
Dear Mark...forever hungry...
Dear Richard...forever seeking...
DearBill...forever flying...
Dear Gary...forever singing...
Dear Patricia...forever unknowing...
....each of you left unwitting fingerprints on my soul...but the time wasnt right for any of you and there were regrets for both of us...even now.  
 
In truth I have written these letters many times in my heart... some things are just to precious to put down on paper, the feelings are so alive that its as if they, like a sprouted seed, begin to die once they come to life under your pen. Even now, years away from the events that shaped these feelings, they live...
 
For as long as love is remembered it lives...As long as we remember those we love, they will never truly die...

 

News Bits For This Week

I didn't have much to say and may slow down posting for a week or two as I work on giving My Wide Blue Seas a new look and catch up on some mail...

We are all fine Woody is working his four days in Kona. The store is slow in the sense of not having the traffic we were having. The weather has been wonderful so people are out seeing the wonders of this island and not shopping which is ok. We get them eventually.

I realized that I was messed up on paying the state excise tax, so ran and paid with a bit of a penalty, but, this leaves me really strapped to buy the equipment for the repair set up. So I am praying for another huge sale. A lady came in today that I've not seen in months, she's dying for the 15mm Tahitian Pearl strand valued at 7500.00 and even has photos of herself trying it on, at home. No go in getting hubby to say yes... When I saw her come to the Door, I nearly passed out as I thought "yes yes yes..." Well, I don't want to get ahead of God but I was getting ready to start to sing "Thank You, Jesus...." One never knows... Things are leaving the store that I never thought would leave, so I don't pre judge anything...

On the Hawaii front I was going to write about the project that Gov. Lingle has started to build 17,000 "affordable" housing units "to deal with the homeless problem before the property and land values are affected and things deteriorate even more..." I laughed out loud when I read that these were for people at "50% of the median state income of $60,000.00, or have incomes of $30,000.00." Yes there is a tent city outside of Hilo where there are new SUV's parked and people have work and are "homeless" or "houseless" but, most of the time the reality is that the homeless have no money and that criteria would mean that 2/3's of Hilo's residents would qualify for these units. The "homeless" wont ever see the inside of one. The thing is, you have to have a place before you can get a job and earn money to buy or rent a place and its catch-22 all the way down... Sorry I cant post the link but none of the papers thought that this story was worth putting on the online papers or you could read about it your self.

We have another large group of residents heading for the sandpile and its leaving a lot of jobs short handed. I think Woody got a call today for an interview to fill one and that would be great, even if its temporary.
 
My Mom is doing famously and is champing at the bit to get back out on her scooter... A sure sign that her overall health is improving.
 
We saw our friends Claudia and Mike this week. Their house in Kapoho will be closing escrow in a week and they are moving their stuff into storage tomorrow. Their loan for their new place in Kaneohe, Oahu, is not moving very fast and like we were when we got here they will be homeless in Hawaii. They got big bucks for their house so they can live where ever, so don't feel sorry for them. Should they not be able to get the loan through they will be sending their stuff on the California and they will travel for a bit then resettle in Chico or Merced or the surrounding area. That isn't first choice as Mike has a commitment to teach at UH Manoa if he wants it, and no job in Cali... In either case I will miss them terribly.
 
Well that is all for now. 

July 15, 2004

What She Was Wearing

what she was wearing

this is my suicide dress
she told him
I only wear it on days
when I'm afraid
I might kill myself
if I don't wear it

you've been wearing it
every day since we met
he said

and these are my arson gloves

so you don't set fire to something?
he asked

exactly

and this is my terrorism lipstick
my assault and battery eyeliner
my armed robbery boots

I'd like to undress you he said
but would that make me an accomplice?

and today she said I'm wearing
my infidelity underwear
so don't get any ideas

and she put on her nervous breakdown hat
and walked out the door



Poem: "what she was wearing," by Denver Butson, from illegible address. © Luquer Street Press.

Sometimes I feel like this. That my inner self is something that I am taking off and putting on like my clothing. That how I feel about life is being taken off and put on. This is not the best way to live, and in light of what I believe...Well...

The compartmentalization of human experience is more akin to a suit of armor than "infidelity underwear", but I get the poets drift and will think about it further and press for a bit of change...

I think that I have mentioned this before that the now four days that Woody is in Kona are very much a solitary existance. Should there be no one in the shop, as it was for two of the three business days, it is truly solitude... like a hermatage...

I have thought of many things during this peace and quiet. Something is happening right now that will test a lot of my feelings, my honesty with myself and what I think God really wants me to do with my life. I will have to choose between the best thing for me, the right thing, my "needs" which are hard to pinpoint, for we all know that sometimes the familiar is a seeming need when the stepping out is the best thing. In this case this might mean staying with the familiar because the situation is going to take a dramtic turn for the good, perhaps. I must always remember the line from the old Eagles tune " that every form of refuge has its price"... Can I be bought? I have come to realize... possibly...

Maybe I can call it " my need for security in the face of adversity body armor" I try to put on the "whole armor of God" and I am praying a lot. "Thy Will" prayers, as this is a good thing, not divorce or sickness or anything like that, but a situation that could (we dont know a lot of details yet about the situation)Both Woody and I are amazed at it...

The mystery will be revealed as events unfold... in the mean time I will wear the overcoat of the love of God and the prayers of the many friends around me...For they may be about to be answered...

July 14, 2004

How to Blog in 30 Easy Steps

I saw this on I am Pariah, and when I read it realized that it was good, but I have edited it for my select readership...to read the original read here

how to blog in 30 easy steps by Tony. commentary by me, the Dancing Rain Girl

1. write every day. Or nearly I have been keeping a longhand journal for 25 years.

2. if you think youre a good writer, write twice a day.
Ive hered it said that to practice the craft of writing one should write 1000 words a day, dont have time for that.

3.dont be afraid to do anything. in fact if youre afraid of something, do it. then do it again. and again. I am a firm believer that if you are thrown from a horse get back on, but some scary stuff Ive done should not be repeated.

4. cuss like a sailor. weelll, I am trying to improve my vocabulary, so I try to find more creative ways of expressing my disgust!

5. dont tell your mom, your work, your friends, the people you want to date, or the people you want to work for about your blog. if they find out and you'd rather they didnt read it, ask them nicely to grant you your privacy. Your diary can be used as evidence against you in a court of law. I learned that in my first divorce. Yet, I am still a rather fearless writer and try to be as painfully honest as I can. When I was 17 I razor bladed out pages of my school girl diary so my future husband wouldnt read it. That was the last censorship of my own writing that I have done. Now I dont care who knows, and I share my blog address with everyone interested.

6. have comments. dont be upset if no one writes in your comments for a long time. eventually they'll write in there. if people start acting mean in your comments, ask them to stop, they probably will. I love it when people comment. It tells me that the world really is out there...

7. have an email address clearly displayed on your blog. sometimes people want to tell you that you rock in private.
Good Idea, Im doing it.

8. dont worry very much about the design of your blog. image is a fakeout. I was thinking about it after I saw the cool revamp of Becomming Normal. But I dont have time just now...

9. use Blogger. it's easy, it's free; and because they are owned by Google, your blog will get spidered better, you will show up in more search results, and more people will end up at your blog. besides, all the other blogging software & alternatives pretty much suck. Sounds like a commercial to me but I would hazzard a guess that this is true...But why does it tweek all the punctuation into Swahilli?

10. use spellcheck unless youre completely totally keeping it real. but even then you might want to use it if you think you wrote something really good. Heres where Blogger falls down. The spell check screws up my writing, and it HATES Hawaiian

11. say exactly what you want to say no matter what it looks like on the screen. then say something else. then keep going. and when youre done, re-read it, and edit it and hit publish and forget about it. When I was in counselling I would try to say something and it wouldnt come out...The gal that was working with me used to say, "Any way you can..." Sooo True

12. link like crazy. link anyone who links you, link your favorites, link your friends. dont be a prude. linking is what seperates bloggers from apes. and especially link if you're trying to prove a point and someone else said it first. it lends credibility even if youre full of it. I love links and need to do more of it...

13. if you havent written about sex, religion, and politics in a week youre probably playing it too safe, which means you probably messed up on #5, in which case start a second blog and keep your big mouth shut about it this time. Weel, lets just get serious on the bloging after all isnt the reason that you started this was to tell the world about your life? Your opinions, what you ate for dinner and so on???

14. Remember: nobody cares which N*Sync member you are, what State you are, which Party of Five kid you are, or which Weezer song you are. the second you put one of those things on your blog you need to delete your blog and try out for the marching band. similarilly, nobody cares what the weather is like in your town, nobody wants you to change their cursor into a butterfly, nobody wants to vote on whether your blog is hot or not, and nobody gives a rat ass what song youre listening to. write something Real for you, about you, every day.
Well, Tony, no, people do care about the weather in Hawaii. Memes and Quiz thingys are fun and often are a good grist for the writers mill so to speak. Kids use a lot of this stuff and thats ok. Blogging is about self expression and as the daughter of a, wife of a, and former member of a few marching bands some of them quite good, I resemble that remark...

15. dont be afraid if you think something has been said before. it has. and better. big whoop. say it anyway using your own words as honestly as you can. just let it out.
True and cool Just say it...or rather Blog it.

16. get Site Meter and make it available for everyone to see. if you're embarrassed that not a lot of people are clicking over to your page, dont be embarrassed by the number, be embarrassed that you actually give a hoot about hits to your blog. it really is just a blog. and hits really dont mean anything. you want Site Meter, though, to see who is linking you so you can thank them and so you can link them back. similarilly, use Technorati, but dont obsess. write.
I need to upgrade my site meter, but I am no technorati, technonovice kindly technoignoramous obviously

17. people like pictures. use them. save them to your own server. or use Blogger's free service. if you dont know how to do it, learn. also get a Buzznet account. several things will happen once you start blogging, one of them is you will learn new things. thats a good thing. Help I would love to put pics on my blog but dont understand the jargon... Help and I will send you Mac Nuts from our orchards here on the Big Island

18. before you hit Save as Draft or Publish Post, select all and copy your masterpiece. you are using a computer and the internet, shit can happen. no need to lose a good post.
This has happened to me, sometimes by Blogger sometimes one of my cats will pounce on the escape key. Save save save. I also save and archive my posts a month at a time on a different system so that I could reprint them one day...

19. push the envelope in what youre writing about and how youre saying it. be more and more honest. get to the root of things. start at the root of things and get deeper. dig. think out loud. keep typing. keep going. eventually you'll find a little treasure chest. every time you blog this can happen if you let it.I have learned a lot about myself from Blogging and it great...

20. change your style. mimic people. write beautiful lies. dream in public. kiss and tell. finger and tell. cry scream fight sing and dont be afraid to be funny. the easiest thing to do is whine when you write. dont be lazy. audblog at least once a week. No sound, but lots of bleeding on the blogging screen

21. write open letters. make lists. call people out on their BS. lead by example. invent and reinvent yourself. start by writing about what happened to you today. for example today i told a hot girl how wonderfully hot she is. Hmmm...I wonder how that turned out. I need to do more of this

22. when in doubt review something. theres not enough reviews on blogs. review a movie you just saw, a tv show, a cd, a kiss you just got, a restaurant, a hike you just took, anything. Cool Idea

23. constantly write about the town that you live in. Oh my Hawaii how I love thee...I will never get tired of doing just that...

24. out yourself. tell your secrets. you can always delete them later.No Censorship just say it

25. dont use your real name. dont write about your work unless you dont care about getting fired. Heh Heh Heh... I have seen this and it aint pretty. Dont write nasty about your boss in a open blog. You will be found out.

26. dont be afraid to come across as an wimp. own your wimpeness.Right on Brother

27. nobody likes poems. dont put your poems on your blog. not even if theyre incredible. especially if theyre incredible. odds are theyre not incredible. bad poems are funny sometimes though, so fine, put your dumb poems on there. whatever.
O'l Tony is wrong about this, poems are the best. I love them and will continue to write about them, they are a part of my style. I think he's not 100% sure of his feelings either...

28. tell us about your friends. Thats the easy part

29. dont apologize about not blogging. nobody cares. just start blogging again. I havent run into this problem yet...

30. read tons of blogs and leave nice comments. I love doing this.

July 13, 2004

In Hawaii, Joe Average gets the Babes

Yes, I see this all the time. Stunningly pretty women and what I would call, yes, Joe Average. Mike Gordon of the Honolulu Advertiser writes...

At the beach, plain guys get the babes


By Mike Gordon
Honolulu Advertiser Staff Writer

Heat waves rippled off the sand on the afternoon of my epiphany. At first, I thought they had baked my brain, that my vision was skewed or my reality overcooked.

But the beach doesn't lie.

There are no secrets here. It's a place where all is revealed, from tan lines to human relations.

And so it was, slouching in my beach chair, pushing sand into a foot rest and feeling like a grilled hot dog, that I gave a cheer for the ordinary guy.

He had staked a stunning claim on the beach: He was dating — even marrying — out of his league, and apparently doing quite well.

Everywhere I looked, there he was, sort of the yin to his companion's yang.

Remember when Billy Joel married Christie Brinkley? That's what it was like, minus the millions.

In a culture that puts good looks and the quality of your abs on a pedestal, these guys were second-string.

Not ugly, just nondescript.

Sort of doughy. Kinda pale. Trunks riding a bit too low. One guy was hairy like a bear.

But the women they were with were beautiful. (Is a man still allowed to say beautiful? I don't care. They were beautiful.)

These women moved like the reels of an R-rated movie. They glided in and out of the water, floated across the sand.

How did these ordinary-looking guys attract them? Moxie? Money? Viagra?

These were brave men, I concluded.

When I was single and encountered women like this, they always seemed unapproachable. Haughty, they could slay you with a glance.

And the men they dated seemed right out of GQ. Bronzed, bulging biceps, etc. Where had they gone?

Of course, Mrs. G. was studying the beachfront scenery, too.

For the record, she's the kind of thoughtful wife who will nudge me and say "thong alert."

The ordinary men probably had super-sized egos and could live with rejection, she said.

They'd keep asking until someone said yes. The law of averages was in their favor.

"Remember, they never look at themselves in the mirror," Mrs. G. said.

But even that had nothing to do with the sea change in the mating game.

Relationships are about supply and demand, she said. Ordinary guys were just the lucky beneficiaries.

The women were in charge of their decisions, not the men, she said. They had simply lowered their standards.

My brain was feeling more and more like baked ham as I recalled the two times Mrs. G. rejected my pleas for a date.

"And the cute girls know there are not that many cute guys out there, so we have to settle," she concluded. "You have to look for personality."

Not to worry, she said. She would never have settled for an ugly man.

Settle? The word sizzled. I looked around the beach. Didn't she finally call me?

Best not to mention that.

Personally, I think that personality wins every time. A good, steady job doesn't hurt either...but there are exceptions...Guys here in Hawaii know that there are more women than men here, they take risks, and get the prize...

July 12, 2004

Why God Created Children

This was sent to Woody...maybe it was a hint from a friend I dont know the person that sent this very well, but it was so true and good that I thought that I would post it.

Why God Created Children

To those of us who have children in our lives, whether they are our own, grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or students...here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said was "DON'T!"

"Don't what?" Adam replied.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit," God said.

"Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve...we have forbidden fruit!!!!!"

"No Way!"

"Yes way!"

"Do NOT eat the fruit!" said God.

"Why?"

"Because I am your Father and I said so!" God replied, wondering why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants.

A few minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked! "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you?" said the Father.

"I don't know," said Eve.

"She started it!" Adam said.

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

"DID NOT!"

Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed. BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself. If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT
1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.
2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.
3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.
4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
5. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.
6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.

ADVICE FOR THE DAY: Be nice to your kids. They will choose your nursing home one day.

AND FINALLY: IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE, DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN" AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"

Seriously,you gotta love the little darlings...

July 11, 2004

I Will Not Be Afraid

Again a straight to the heart word from Mrs Elliot-Gren. I so need to hear this. I know that it is true I just need to take heart and believe it


I Will Not Be Afraid


News reports come every day concerning economic and political calamities about to befall us all, not to mention famines, tornadoes, earthquakes, and volcanoes, things which may at any moment strike us or people we love. There are always plenty of good reasons to be afraid--unless you know that things are under control. A Christian has this "inside information." Things are, in fact, under control. God is our Refuge, our Strength, our Mighty Fortress. Nothing will get by the moat of his protection without his permission. To be afraid of what happens today or what may happen tomorrow is not only an awful waste of energy, it is not only useless, it is disobedient. We are forbidden to fear anything but the Lord Himself.

When Christians in China were being hounded to death in the 1930s, one of them (I am told) wrote this simple song, which has helped me in countless times of fear ever since I learned it as a high school girl:

I will not be afraid.

I will not be afraid.

I will look upward, and travel onward,

And not be afraid.

Will power, of course, will not always overcome human emotions. But willed obedience to the One who is in charge, coupled with prayer for his help in vanquishing our natural fears, is something else.

Yes it is. I have a lot of will power on some levels and not so much on others. However, learning to place my confidence in Him Who is Able, is a daily task that I perform moment to moment. A lot of changes may come my way, certain a lot have come to pass. This faith journey is never dull and boring and is always enlightening.

This Week's Saturday Slant Week 17 Year 2

The Backstage Pass
The concert was incredible loud, rocking, virile. Your favorite artist, dripping with sensuality, held the audience and especially you enrapt from entrance to encore. During the final encore, a stage hand drapes around your neck a laminated Backstage Pass. It's from your onstage idol, the roadie says. Thanks to a radio giveaway, you're at the concert alone. What happens next? Who is the artist?

Ok Pariah...I think I can do this while keeping this PG-13. Seriously, I have two local acts that I can think of that I would like to have this honor from. One is the incredible vocal ensemble Ho'okena these are real, just regular kine guys with regular jobs and stuff and boy can they sing... I think they are pretty good looking too, but don't go off for that and never did, even as a teen.

Now choice number two...Well he is a heart breaker as far as the looks go around here in the islands, but he sings so beautifully that grabs you first. Kauaii's own Keali'i Reichel. He's better known to the mainland having fronted a lot of different artists. I truly love his rendition of Steven Curtis Chapman's "I Will be Here".

On a totally differentent note, literally, there is my dream vocal event, to sing one of the great choral works like Beethoven's 9th symphony, or Morton Lauridsen's magnificent vocal prayer Lux Aeterna with the Los Angeles Master Chorale I miss them more than many things I miss about LA, and when I play Lux Aeterna I weep every time, maybe more now after 9-11 since it was played often at memorial services. I do believe from the wording that it was written from the same Old Testiment passages at was Mozart's Requiem, which was also used extensively for public memorial services.

I guess I would like a chance to perform with these guys, rather than all the romantic stuff which is where the Slant was headed but so far no dice... Sorry Pariah, great attempt at creativity

July 09, 2004

Hale Pu'uhonua (House in the Place of Safety)

people have emailed me asking if I live in a grass shack... No but that might happen one day...in answer to the question I have a few picsfor you to see and a few thoughts about my home on the edge of the forest in Puna.

I have thought a lot about writing about our home here in Puna. Woody said as he came home July 4 that he really feels like he is starting to connect with this house being home because he is away from it so much. I feel like I need to connect to it more by being in it, but feel a bit more territorial about it having been told this week that the foreclosure papers were drawn up two months ago and I forstalled them by making a very difficult to make extra payment...Graciously I am being allowed to make up the other fees and back payments 50.00 at a time. The payment is so low I blush for having to feel so helpless that I cant make it on time and in full. In our lives in California this would have been nothing. Here is is impossible.

Today (7-6) as I start this post, its hot and sunny and so beautiful outside...woody is mowing the lawn so I cant sit out as I am so allergic to the grass. A strong breeze is blowing from the south east or Makai (from the ocean) and its cool inside the house. The tall ceilings draw in every breeze. We have neither heating or airconditioning.

When we bought the house, in the summer of 2001, we had no idea that we would be moving here so soon or that we would call this home a refuge of safety in a world that changed so dramatically so suddenly with the events of 9-11. In many ways it is. I know that life is much slower here and in many ways much safer here. There are no drive by shootings, no police helecopters circling over head, and there is this aura of calm, even in our neighborhood that is supposed to be so bad, cause of all the drugs. Its the newest nicest place I have ever lived in, and I am grateful to God everyday to just be here even when I complain about it...

The house was built by a couple of refugees from Missouri, who build a new house livine in it for a bit and then sell it. Mrs Campbel is a local real estate agent and Mr. Campbell is a general contractor but is really a finishing specialist. The last time we had the house appraised, the guy said that you dont see details like rounded edges and carfully fitted window ledges...(for their cats to lay in). He was a passionate gardener and had a sunken Japanese rock garden (now gone to ruin by time, earth settling and neglect) and lovely plants and trees. I find all of this gardening amazing as it is done with no soil hardly. The house is built on the remains of a lava flow that occured about 1000 years ago. Yes it could happen again, But I have lived in earthquake country and think that there are scarier things nature can kick up!

Mr. Campbell built sun lanais open porches with little latticed walls all around it. Should I stay here and get some funds I will enclose these and turn them into screened in lanais as I am eated alive by the bugs even now three years later.

There was dingy grey carpet in the house. The sun and mildew fades it right away so I had wall to wall ceramic tile laid down and I love it so that what ever house I own in whatever climate I move to I will lay this sort of thing as it is nearly maintanance free and a mopping and dusing and thats all. When I see the dirt I sweep up and think of that trapped in my carpets I want to gag... We have two fountains , a large rock fountain on the lanai that is not operational now and I think I will be trying to find it a home, and a small one in the entry way that provides a delicate background noise... Imagine living in a place with so little noise that your own breathing startles you...


We are 12 air miles from the ocean vent are for the Kilauea Volcano. Mrs Campbell said that in 1998 the volcanoes activity increased and a huge fountain of lava sprang up over 1000 ft into the air. The red glow was visible from the house and at night you could hear the roar of it. I found that amazing. We are a mile away from the ocean so we cant hear it and contrary to the name of the subdivision "Hawaiian Beaches" there are no true beaches in the area. Instead there are huge rugged cliffs that seem to plunge into the ocean. I used to go down ther often and look at the sea, and think about the future. There is so much building going on down there now that the peacefulness is gone which is sad.

I have several wishes for the house. I wish that I had more storage, but I am learning to throw things away and not keep them past a usefull life, so that helps. I wish that I could grow things, but I have yet to really understand the tropical soiless gardens... its more about what you dont want to grow here than what you want to grow. Round Up is as important a gardening tool as a shovel. I wish that I felt that we had neighbors, not these hostile people with angry sons and loud rudenesses that drive me up a wall. But what would Paradise be with out a snake or two..BORRING thats what.

So in Honor of aloha friday, My peice of the Hawaiian dream. God gave it to me now its up to me to keep it.