April 27, 2008
John 16~ Jesus Has Overcome The World
The Verdant Lake Shore Lake Bella Vista, Arkansas
John 16 from the New Living TranslationJesus Warns the Disciples
"I have told you these things so that you won't fall away. For you will be expelled from the synagogues, and the time is coming when those who kill you will think they are doing God a service. This is because they have never known the Father or me. Yes, I'm telling you these things now, so that when they happen, you will remember I warned you. I didn't tell you earlier because I was going to be with you for a while longer.
The Work of the Holy Spirit
"But now I am going away to the one who sent me, and none of you has asked me where I am going. Instead, you are very sad. But it is actually best for you that I go away, because if I don't, the Counselor won't come. If I do go away, he will come because I will send him to you. And when he comes, he will convince the world of its sin, and of God's righteousness, and of the coming judgment. The world's sin is unbelief in me. Righteousness is available because I go to the Father, and you will see me no more. Judgment will come because the prince of this world has already been judged.
"Oh, there is so much more I want to tell you, but you can't bear it now. When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not be presenting his own ideas; he will be telling you what he has heard. He will tell you about the future. He will bring me glory by revealing to you whatever he receives from me. All that the Father has is mine; this is what I mean when I say that the Spirit will reveal to you whatever he receives from me.Sadness Will Be Turned to Joy
"In just a little while I will be gone, and you won't see me anymore. Then, just a little while after that, you will see me again."
The disciples asked each other, "What does he mean when he says, `You won't see me, and then you will see me'? And what does he mean when he says, `I am going to the Father'? And what does he mean by `a little while'? We don't understand."
Jesus realized they wanted to ask him, so he said, "Are you asking yourselves what I meant? I said in just a little while I will be gone, and you won't see me anymore. Then, just a little while after that, you will see me again. Truly, you will weep and mourn over what is going to happen to me, but the world will rejoice. You will grieve, but your grief will suddenly turn to wonderful joy when you see me again. It will be like a woman experiencing the pains of labor. When her child is born, her anguish gives place to joy because she has brought a new person into the world. You have sorrow now, but I will see you again; then you will rejoice, and no one can rob you of that joy. At that time you won't need to ask me for anything. The truth is, you can go directly to the Father and ask him, and he will grant your request because you use my name. You haven't done this before. Ask, using my name, and you will receive, and you will have abundant joy.
"I have spoken of these matters in parables, but the time will come when this will not be necessary, and I will tell you plainly all about the Father. Then you will ask in my name. I'm not saying I will ask the Father on your behalf, for the Father himself loves you dearly because you love me and believe that I came from God. Yes, I came from the Father into the world, and I will leave the world and return to the Father."
Then his disciples said, "At last you are speaking plainly and not in parables. Now we understand that you know everything and don't need anyone to tell you anything. From this we believe that you came from God."
Jesus asked, "Do you finally believe? But the time is coming...in fact, it is already here...when you will be scattered, each one going his own way, leaving me alone. Yet I am not alone because the Father is with me. I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world."
Labels: Scenic Arkansas, scripture
April 24, 2008
my bench Conner Jeweler's School New Albany IN
I pull my visor down and my vision forms and all becomes clear, the tiny bits of solder become shining squares against a black background . I take my torch and apply heat to the square and it becomes a molten ball. I quickly scoop up the tiny ball with a iron pick hoping that the ball will stick to the pick. Thank you, it does, now heat the ring then on the prong and off 4 times or so the little ball should jump off the pick when held close to the hotter metal and stick to the prong... I am successful about half of the time...I am successful now. Quickly, I grope for the prong wire and try to heat the solder on the ring just enough so it will cause the wire to stick to the prong when I touch it, but not so hot that the solder will come of onto the wire...I must do this quickly as the wire conducts heat fast and I need my touch to tell me if the wire adhears I have burned myself twice this way this morning and I am not up for more torture. I am successful only 1 in 10 tries today, this one was sort of OK, at least the wire stuck on but it was so crooked that if this was an actual customer job I would have to sand it off and start over. A miserable waste of time...
I knew it would be hard. This is exactly the sort of thing that comes hard to me, the One that can barely walk and chew gum at the same time...But I get it eventually...
There is no "Plan B"
There is no "Exit Plan"
There is no giving up...
There are a lot of issues. First I am still not 100 percent well. I have a ragged cough and a lot of Lung congestion. I am still having to sleep sitting up. Thank you for your prayers and comments.
I went to class this monday, but was too weary tuesday to go in and the instructor started making noises about "giving me part of my money back if I felt like I couldn't do it."...When I asked him if he thought that I had potential he said "Yes, that I have done work that was up to store standards and some perfectly. I have the ability to learn what I need to to open my business." "OK then, lets get going.." I said the next morning...
But there are no other students right now, and the hired help quit, so his other apprentice, a gal that is simply amazing for such a short amount of time at the bench, is now hired to be the gal friday and is moving from Chicago to work there and go into the business that way. But other than her there is no one else to handle the counter, take in repairs and buy the gold that has turned this semi profitable business into literally a gold mine. Today it was discovered that a watch that was taken in for repair by a student trying to help,(and not done correctly either) was missing and the customer wanted it back. I expended no effort in trying to find it but focused on my work...I felt the tension rising so I spoke up today about it.
I am a paying student, I have no time to waste getting involved with the operations of the business. I dont need to earn "credit" towards tools or other stuff. I am there to learn, and if no teaching is going on then I expect to be practicing what I have already learned and have the materiels and tools at hand to do that. If my instructor is not able to teach and I am not able to work that day on other things then I need to be compensated for that day. So while I am understanding about illness and the like, no attitudes for not picking up the phone or taking to the counter customers, that is not my place to be doing that. I dont dump trash or clean toilets, that is not my place either...
I know that the Instructor agreed verbally that I was right but I can see issues like this for the whole time that I am here. Woody and I discussed the possibility that the Instructor my be unable to continue in the long term (he confided that he is looking into a possible early retirement due to his health) and that we may be forced to look at a Plan B such as the school in Florida or even seeing if the Drouhards are still teaching up in Ohio. It really could give me the worries... but it also is a reminder that God is fully behind every thing that goes on.
I have signed a lease for three months and then it is month to month. I only have given three months of the 6 months of money to the school. If this is what God really wants me to do then He will make a way. I will trust Him to bring it to fruition in His time.
One of the things that makes it hard is the horrible music they play in there. I have started bringing my Ipod and listening to the wonderful podcasts, teaching and other programs as I did at thisplace. I feel a real lift in my heart as I take in daily food from God's word as well as instruction from great teachers and others. I can listen to this as long as I dont have a demonstration or DVD to watch. Tuning out the constant distractions is a huge help to me.
I am as committed as a soilder to this. I dont know what the future will hold, but I want to get through this and succeed. For the first time in my life, I dont want to be told that "I cant" or "You annoy me cause you arent doing it well enough so stop already" or " I am sick of this so we have to stop"... My life as I know it depends on making a go of this business.
I said tonight that I dont know how I will feel about staying in NW Arkansas if I have to work for someone. Commuting is just crazy, the price of gas is nearly $4.00 a gallon. If we came to the city like moving here we could use Public transit and be closer to everything we need. I can walk to the store, the doctor I am using even church if I chose. Its all within a mile of here. Its 5 miles to a store in Bella Vista. I could get used to apartment life if it was like this place, so very quiet all of the time...but I am getting ahead again
I cant do that. I have promised myself that I would try to live in the day one day at a time while I am here. I am trying to not fret (picture a horse breaking out in a nervious lather pulling at the bit out of unseen fear while standing safe in its stall.. that is "fretting") or worry or get ahead too far. That is not what this is about. Its been hard while so ill, getting out will help a lot as I feel better.
Annabelle is doing well and is the darling of the complex. I have to restrain her exuburances when meeting new people, but other than that she is a happy camper loving the climb up and down the stairs to go walking outside. I am so glad that I was able to bring her with me.
I ask for your continued prayers and good wishes, for I most certainly need them as I climb this mountain one step at a time.
Labels: Annabelle, Artisans Fine Jewelry Repair, Bella Vista, Business start up, Conner School, Faith, Health, IN, Kentucky, New Albany, Woody, working
April 20, 2008
Psalm 27 ~ The Lord Is My Light
Glorious Morning over Bella Vista ARThe Lord Is My Light and My Salvation
A Song Of David.
The Lord is my light and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be afraid?
When evildoers assail me
to eat up my flesh,
my adversaries and foes,
it is they who stumble and fall.
Though an army encamp against me,
my heart shall not fear;
though war arise against me,
yet I will be confident.
One thing have I asked of the Lord,
that will I seek after:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord
and to inquire in his temple.
For he will hide me in his shelter
in the day of trouble;
he will conceal me under the cover of his tent;
he will lift me high upon a rock.
And now my head shall be lifted up
above my enemies all around me,
and I will offer in his tent
sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make melody to the Lord.
Hear, O Lord, when I cry aloud;
be gracious to me and answer me!
You have said, “Seek [fn4] my face.”
My heart says to you,
“Your face, Lord, do I seek.”
Hide not your face from me.
Turn not your servant away in anger,
O you who have been my help.
Cast me not off; forsake me not,
O God of my salvation!
For my father and my mother have forsaken me,
but the Lord will take me in.
Teach me your way, O Lord,
and lead me on a level path
because of my enemies.
Give me not up to the will of my adversaries;
for false witnesses have risen against me,
and they breathe out violence.
I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living!
Wait for the Lord;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the Lord!
Labels: Scenic Arkansas, scripture
April 16, 2008
"We Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Program...."
One of my best friends now that hot tea is my drink of choice these days...
Definition of Interruption
The act of interrupting, or breaking in upon.
The state of being interrupted; a breach or break, caused by the abrupt intervention of something foreign; intervention; interposition.
Obstruction caused by breaking in upon course, current, progress, or motion; stop; hindrance; as, the author has met with many interruptions in the execution of his work; the speaker or the argument proceeds without interruption.
Temporary cessation; intermission; suspension.
The coughing fits were unbelievable in their intensity, I gasped for air to find none, then to feel my brain thrown sideways against my skull, as my diaphragm jerked my chest forward in another heaving spasmodic wave. I coughed none stop for thirty minutes. I know, I was watching a clock across the room. The barking sounds coming from my throat confused my dog who was whining and barking at me, tail between her legs, perhaps despairing that somehow she was displeasing me and I was yelling at her. She knew there was a problem but not what it was. I sat there on the floor, in the mess I had made, trying to reassure her non verbally, my head spinning...Finally in an effort to get up and get to the bathroom, I managed to get up and into a chair off of my knees... Only to start coughing again, and as I tried to stand, I fell forward and blacked out...
I woke to Annabelle licking my face in a frantic effort to wake me up... She is my best friend in truth...
... "Doctor I have been ill for nearly three weeks but the cough started 10 days ago..." and it started again, the incredible coughing spasms, I practically threw myself into this mans arms the forward motion was so violent. I know he was surprised because of the look on his face as he held me by the shoulders as I coughed my brains out into the towel he provided quickly. Looking at what I had produced, he said " As you said no sign of infection and you are an allergy sufferer... With the rains the mold here is particularly bad, and of course everything in the world is blooming just now... but I don't think that is what this is. I think you have Pertussis.
I looking at him and said "Whooping Cough? I know I was vaccinated for that, Im too old for the "Dont Vacinate your Kid for fear of what ever" crowd...
He went on to say that the description of the course of my illness exactly matches what happens when Whooping Cough is presented Low grade infection that seems to go away, but all that has done is fool the body into thinking that its done its job in the meantime the Pertussis bacteria breeds in your lungs, filling them up. By the time your body realizes there is this problem its too late and the horrendous
cough is the last ditch effort of the body to fight it off. Infants suffucate from the mucus this plague generates. In adults, you take over the counter drugs like Mucinex and it doest touch it. I had taken OTCs for the full three weeks and was so saturated with the various chemicals in them that my ususally low blood pressure was up to 160/100. That in an of its self was scary, and had I not gone to the doctor, that could have had a very bad outcome.
So the doctor gave me an antibiotic. I was still skeptical, but he said that this antibiotic was fairly specific and if I had something else my sputum would go from clear to slightly discolored, if it is pertussis, it will be very ugly, and a lot of it. Take the other three percriptions to handle the cough, clear liquids and bed rest. NO OTC's period, no even asprin for a few days. drink as much water as I can to clear out and reduce my Blood Pressure... that would go a long way to making me feel better
Fortunaly, the nest is well stocked with food and doggy treats, I I went home and locked myself in. He was right, my sputum turned so vile that had he not mentioned it I might have gone to ER thinking I was dying finally.The first day was still very bad but it has gradually gotten better, but I am still very weak and feel like a feather could knock me over.
My instructor was very encouraging, and rightly wants me to stay home untill I am over this. The atmosphere at the school, with the chemicals, particulate from filing sanding and polishing as well as the smoking that goes on there is no good for me right now. I am not missing anything because the classes repeat at intervals and I am going to be here for a long while yet.
Woody was willing to drive back out here, but I waved him off as he could get this too and he is better off where he is. Nothing on him, mind you, but his ideas of pampering me and mine are way different. I really need to just be quiet and alone. I dont need errands run or anything, Annabelle is going to do her business on the pad things and yes my trash and out bound mail are piling up but perhaps she and I will take to short walk to the trash and mail box today, Its a nice sunny day today.
I used to find that innteruptions into "my" life plan were so annoying...but I think now that they are God's way of showing me something. My broken foot last fall was a great example of that. It slowed me down to see the possiblities of a different future than the one that I was bitterly resigning myself to. It gave me time to listen to God and to my own heart and to formulate a plan.
I see that this is true in this situation as well. I have had time to connect with my new surroundings. Time to rest to play and bond with Annabelle, who now wants to be with me every moment I am home (other than jump into the shower, she cant understand why I would want to get wet everyday....) To think and be quiet... that has been a great gift...
But some more tea and time to get comfy on the the couch. I still cough violently when laying down. I am so looking forward to a real nights sleep prone on a bed. At Dawn the sun rises just over the first green. Its lovely to see the sunrise again.
Labels: Annabelle, Breaking News, Conner School, Faith, Health, Woody
April 13, 2008
Acts 2 14a,36-41~ The Sermon of Peter
The Worship Center of Watkins United Methodist Church. www.watkinsumc.com
Springhurst/Westport Louisville KY
Acts 2 14a, 36-41
But Peter, standing with the eleven, lifted up his voice and addressed them, “Men of Judea and all who dwell in Jerusalem, let this be known to you, and give ear to my words"
Let all the house of Israel therefore know for certain that God has made him both Lord and Christ, this Jesus whom you crucified.”
Now when they heard this they were cut to the heart, and said to Peter and the rest of the apostles, “Brothers, what shall we do?”And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.For the promise is for you and for your children and for all who are far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to himself.”And with many other words he bore witness and continued to exhort them, saying, “Save yourselves from this crooked generation.”So those who received his word were baptized, and there were added that day about three thousand souls.
Labels: Louisville, scripture, UMC
April 12, 2008
Thunder Over Louisville
Looking down the fairway to the 2nd tee. This is the view off my balcony... The large white building in the distance is the Ford Truck plant. Legends at Indian Springs Louisville KY
One of the things that I have loved about our traveling here in the US is discovering wonderful local events that nobody seems to have ever heard about. We all know about the Kentucky Derby, America's Greatest Horse Race, and its sister race for the Sistah's the Kentucky Oaks, held a day apart the first saturday and friday of May respectively. There is plenty of pageantry to go around right? A week of parties and dances, BBQ's and parades all the proceeds going to various charity venues....
Did I say a week???? Try a month...yes a whole month of Carnival
featuring Airshows, Balloon racing, a world class Marathon, Musical events with both Rock and Country stars arriving to do concerts some on schedule others just "showing up" to jam at a Charity event. As I read about the various events in the paper I am curising this flu bug that has had me in a vise like grip for nearly three weeks and is worsening. I would have loved to have gone to the airshow today.Called Thunder Over Louisville
, the Airshow is combined with the largest Pyrotechnical display in America. Using a bridge that spans the Ohio River as it launching pad, thousands of rockets are fired off in an amazing display. I watched on my TV and it was amazing. They also had barges with different dysplays on them and everytime the "theme" changed there was the firing of 50 howitzers brought in from Ft. Knox. I am sure that there is film of this on YouTube and if I can link it up I will
My personal Thunder over Louisville is my horrendous cough, that was so violent that I blacked out this afternoon and fell out of a chair. Annabelle got out of the way, and woke me by licking my face. At that point I surrendered and got dressed and went to a local Urgent Care. Closed for you guessed it... everyone was at the riverfront... so it will be my first stop tomorrow which means I will be forgoing church, just as well.
The cough has me worried. I do not have an infection there is no sign of that but rather a huge over abundance of mucus of an egg white consitancy. Allergy and very bad too. I am convinced it the shop, with the chemicals the particulates from polishing and the smoking of nearly everyone there. Mucinex is not touching this, so I am trying to remain as quiet as I can, and perhaps tomorrow get some relief...I am afraid this will mean steriods but I am willing to do what I have to do to learn this trade. Charlie is a genious, and I can learn a lot from him if I can get over this and hold up. He feels that I am doing well and that with time and health (how much attention can you pay if you are dropping off from being OD on cough meds...last thursday I was sent home for fear that I wouldnt make it home, and stayed home on friday) I will be really good because I care about what I do... that has to make a difference.
Annabelle is in her bed, the booming has finally stopped and she is at peace. It is tempting to take her to be with me but she wont be able to do that once we get home so its into her crate for the night. She loved taking her nap with me today as we watched the airplaines from the airshow fly about. It was pretty amazing and perhaps I will get back here at another time to see this event again
Thunder over Louisville The reminants of a very bad storm that did a lot of damage in the area
Labels: Annabelle, Conner School, Health, Kentucky, Louisville
April 08, 2008
A Whiter Shade of Pale
The White Bedroom at the Legends
I am settling into my digs here and I am starting to enjoy the empty space and the peace of not having to try to figure out how to live in my situation at home. Not having to deal with the clutter and stuff ...well ....I can breathe here
I have yet to reconcile the colorlessness of this place. I have never lived in a more unstimulated environment. I love a white wall, but a wall is only a background for art or ornaments, not as an end in itself. I know that this was done to facilitate the "Corporate" set up but its not me
When Woody was here we talked about putting up curtains and doing this or that. But the truth is that I really cant afford to redecorate, and my thought is now to learn to enjoy the peaceful blankness of the canvas of this home, and enjoy the view of the golf course and the comfort and peace of the place. I could be sharing a house with another student as some have done that have gone to the school.The Lord has provided for my every need.
What I think is funny is the contents of the cartons that I brought with me. Books ect. Think about what you would bring with you...Some of the more interesting things that I brought with me
8 cartons of nutrisystems (well its food I have and why not eat it)
3 Bibles as well as a copy of the Catechism of the Catholic Church
6 boxes of votive candles Cant burn them with the kitties around will use them here, I brought candle holders as well
My book list and CDs not to mention my Ipod all loaded up...
What would you bring to your deserted island?
I found this teapot at a local market. I had nothing to boil water in and this added a bit of color to the kitchen
Labels: Conner School, Kentucky
April 06, 2008
Isaiah 12~ The Lord Is My Strength and My Song
Spring Pasture, Nottingham Farms, Shelby Co. KentuckyThe Lord Is My Strength and My Song
You will say in that day:
I will give thanks to you, O Lord,
for though you were angry with me,
your anger turned away,
that you might comfort me.
Behold, God is my salvation;
I will trust, and will not be afraid;
for the Lord God is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation.
With joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation.
And you will say in that day:
Give thanks to the Lord,
call upon his name,
make known his deeds among the peoples,
proclaim that his name is exalted.
Sing praises to the Lord, for he has done gloriously;
let this be made known in all the earth.
Shout, and sing for joy, O inhabitant of Zion,
for great in your midst is the Holy One of Israel.
Labels: Kentucky, scripture
April 04, 2008
Skating Away On The Thin Ice Of A New Day
Peaceful Ohio River Near Albany Indiana.
3am departure from the house in Arkansas, Woody at the wheel and Annabelle in her travel crate. The van only partially filled but filled never the less with those things that I think will aid me during this period of my life.
As we pulled out I thought about an old Jethro Tull tune... Not big on the first verse but the second and the third seemed very appropriateSkating away ---
skating away ---
skating away on the thin ice of the New Day.
So as you push off from the shore,
won't you turn your head once more --- and make your peace with everyone?
For those who choose to stay,
will live just one more day ---
to do the things they should have done.
And as you cross the wilderness, spinning in your emptiness:
you feel you have to pray.
Looking for a sign
that the Universal Mind... has written you into the Passion Play.
Skating away ---
skating away ---
skating away on the thin ice of the New Day.
And as you cross the circle line, the ice-wall creaks behind ---
you're a rabbit on the run.
And the silver splinters fly in the corner of your eye ---
shining in the setting sun.
Well, do you ever get the feeling that the story's
too damn real and in the present tense?
Or that everybody's on the stage, and it seems like
you're the only person sitting in the audience?
Skating away ---
skating away ---
skating away on the thin ice of the New Day.
I have spent the last four weeks "making peace" with everyone...that I could. I wish that I had been able to spend more time with people that matter to me that I wont see for months, but what was done is done and now we are on this new road.
We stopped only for the briefest rest stops. I was able to take Annabelle walking. She did a great job traveling and even though she has found herself in a vortex of change. There is not one thing the same about her life from this week to the last, but she is flexible and good hearted and has been a big help in my ajustment to the new surroundings
It seems that a doogy kiss or a good walk around the block cures everything...
The drive out while long was uneventful. I have had the flu for nearly a week and was feeling pretty bad as we loaded the van and took off. Between sleep apnea and double dipping on cold medicines, I dropped off constantly, so Woody did most of the driving. I was very grateful. Without him I coulndnt have done this.
We arrived in Louisville and our apartment was ready. We were grateful for a bed and a location with over 300 eating opportunities with in a short distance so we could fine refreshment. The Springhurst district has some of the finest shopping and dining opportunities in the city. I can walk accross the street to the mall or the Meijer store, and drive to an additional 200 stores and resturants. They also have a "spa" for Annabelle with doggy daycare and overnight.
Im crashing until monday when I start my training at the Conner School. They have really improved the classroom area and have opened a retail studio next door. There is only one student currently, and joy of joy, it seems that Charles has stayed off the smoking. My lungs will be eternally grateful
We have had two days of heavy heavy rain here. Flooding in a number of areas and even in this area of high ground, the gournd is soggy like a wet sponge. My rooms overlook the first green and today was the first sunny day and there were plenty of golfers cursing the SLOOOOW sloppy break into the cup.
Woody and I have had a good week here. He has done everything he can to help me get settled in. I think he likes it here, There is less of eveything and it feels like a vacation home rather than our house. Its given me the idea that getting rid of about half of my stuff it likely the best thing that I can do for us at home...
Annabelle loves the things that are missing... The kitties! She is free to do what she wants to do and we dont have to worry about Makkie chasing her or Annabelle getting into the litter box or the cats food both are very bad for her to be involved in. We are having some struggle with the bathroom. I should be so lucky really. She has no desire to go on her peepad but will hold it forever until I can take her outside. With the pouring rain this was not possible, so with paitence, treats and some prayer she is starting to understand that she HAS to go when I put her in her bathroom and that going out is a treat. I will try to get her out twice a day when I can.But with more bad weather on the way this is going to be tough.
I really like the situation, I am so grateful for every little comfort that has been accorded to me and am ready for this next phase of my life. I will be putting Woody on a plane sunday evening for NW Arkansas, and his new life. He hasnt lived alone much in his life and this will be an interesting experience for him
Labels: Annabelle, Conner School, Louisville, Traveling, weather