November 30, 2004

Privacy

The Endless Clifts Waipio Lookout North Kohala Hawaii...

I am a private person...

I seldom have someone other than Woody in my space for more than a few hours at a time...and have not lived with anyone else in my home other than Woody since 1988...Its a shock, I think, just having the vibrations of another soul in the home...I enjoy it, and having visitors is a treat, and feel the loss deeply in the absence of it when visitors leave...

This is a statement made...I know that all must sound crazy... after all, I have broadcasted my life on the information super highway billboard, known as the Blogasphere. I dont mind sharing information, in fact I have found it very theraputic...sort of like going to group therapy after so many years...But in the past few days I have been feeling things Id rather not discuss and dont want to write about. I feel like I have not so much something to hide but feel rather over exposed... like I have a sunburn of the soul... its a physical thing...

Maybe I just need to shut up...

I will be posting about my time with Monica... We went to a number of places on the Island, with the crowning moments I think here at Waipio Valley, where this photo was taken. It was a lovely time, and a reveiling time which I think is why I feel so odd...

I may not post much for the next week or so I am off to LA 12-2 to see my Mom and dont know when I can get to a computer. Will be back on the 8th.

I have many questions that I have for myself... I feel somewhat fragmented and a bit unsure of myself... Could be that I am just weary and need a few days to recover. I have been more physically active than I have been and while I like that, I am tired. I am also Hiving again... For those that dont know one of the reasons that I came to the islands was to leave behind the allergies that caused me to break out in hives the size of dinner plates in a 6-8 hour cycle 24-7... Either its the pineapple, or the thought of going back to LA and dealing with my Mom and a bunch of stuff that has come up in the past week with her...

I would appreciate your prayers and good thoughts as I venture back to California for the first time in over three years its bound to be a shock.

November 28, 2004

Oh, Our Help In Ages Past

Lava Entombed Ohia Tree Lava Tree State Park Puna Hawaii Tree was envelpoed in lava as it flowed past this tree creating this column of stone that is 1000s of years old

Oh,God Our Help In Ages Past

Our God, our help in ages past,
Our hope for years to come,
Our shelter from the stormy blast,
And our eternal home.

Under the shadow of Thy throne
Thy saints have dwelt secure;
Sufficient is Thine arm alone,
And our defense is sure.

Before the hills in order stood,
Or earth received her frame,
From everlasting Thou art God,
To endless years the same.

Thy Word commands our flesh to dust,
Return, ye sons of men
All nations rose from earth at first,
And turn to earth again.

A thousand ages in Thy sight
Are like an evening gone;
Short as the watch that ends the night
Before the rising sun.

The busy tribes of flesh and blood,
With all their lives and cares,
Are carried downwards by the flood,
And lost in following years.

Time, like an ever rolling stream,
Bears all its sons away;
They fly, forgotten, as a dream
Dies at the opening day.

Like flowery fields the nations stand
Pleased with the morning light;
The flowers beneath the mowers hand
Lie withering ere tis night.

Our God, our help in ages past,
Our hope for years to come,
Be Thou our guard while troubles last,
And our eternal home.

Issac Watts 1719

November 26, 2004

Voyagers

Wailoa Estuary Hilo Boat Harbor...

Its been a great three days with Monica here and our adventures with the store... It is so dead, and we had over 5000 cruise passengers here for the day, yesterday, with nothing set up for them to do . We handed out flyers telling people about the store being open but most took a look at the closed up shops and ran back to the boats...

We closed up at two PM and after tearing down the shop we drove over to the Nani Mau Gardens, for Thanksgiving Buffet" The gardens were lovely... It has been very wet these last few days and I in my formal Muu muu didnt stray from the appointed paths. My camera was acting up, purly opperator error so I didnt get many snaps... But I got quite enough to eat and it was lovely

Today we are off to the Volcano Arts Center Craft fair in Volcano, for a bit of shopping. Since everyone will be shopping their hearts out at Walmart, The store is closing...Woody is standing guard somewhere all day.


Monica bought me a book of prints by the Hawaiian artist and Historian Herb Kane called "Voyagers". He was the driving force behind the development and sailing of the Voyaging Canoe "Hokulea" and therefore, close to my heart. I love this gift and will cherish it. I have begun to collect some objects that remind me of my Hawaii, especiallly the photographs that I have taken. The lingering Good Bye is hard ...

November 25, 2004

Give Thanks

"Ginger Lei" Selvn Chance photo

Give thanks with a grateful heart
Give thanks to the Holy One
Give thanks because He's given
Jesus Christ, His Son

And Now
Let the weak say
"I am strong!"

Let the poor say
"I am rich"

Because of what
The Lord has done!

Give thanks...

Henry Smith 1978

One of my mottos is "Cultivate a heart of gratitude." I try to be grateful for everything, even the stuff that hurts or makes no sense at the time, because it will eventually, I hope. In this world that seems to be hurtling out of control, I know that my God is here. I am thankful for that. I am thankful for friends that care about me and for family that loves me and for you my readers that listen to me.

I hope that you have a wonderful day today and that tomorrow brings you the same sense of thankfulness, and the day after that as well, for the grateful heart is the sure cure for much of the worlds ills. Cultivating that heart would go a long way to heal the pain of many. It is a choice. Let us choose thankfulness, over any other emotion. The words "Thank You" will heal more strife than "I Love You" when spoken with sincerity.

And like Paul, in his letter to the Phillippian Church, wrote...

I thank my God upon every remembrance of you,
always in every prayer of mine making request for you all with joy,
for your fellowship in the gospel from the first day until now,
being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ; just as it is right for me to think this of you all, because I have you in my heart, inasmuch as both in my chains and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel, you all are partakers with me of grace.
For God is my witness, how greatly I long for you all with the affection of Jesus Christ.
And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment,
that you may approve the things that are excellent, that you may be sincere and without offense till the day of Christ,
being filled with the fruits of righteousness which are by Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

be blessed today

November 24, 2004

Happiness

Wave spray Laupahoehoe Point


Happiness

.
There's just no accounting for happiness,
or the way it turns up like a prodigal
who comes back to the dust at your feet
having squandered a fortune far away.

And how can you not forgive?
You make a feast in honor of what
was lost, and take from its place the finest
garment, which you saved for an occasion
you could not imagine,
and you weep night and day
to know that you were not abandoned,
that happiness saved its most extreme form
for you alone.

No, happiness is the uncle you never
knew about, who flies a single-engine plane
onto the grassy landing strip, hitchhikes
into town, and inquires at every door
until he finds you asleep midafternoon.
as you so often are during the unmerciful
hours of your despair.

It comes to the monk in his cell.
It comes to the woman sweeping the street
with a birch broom, to the child
whose mother has passed out from drink.
It comes to the lover,
to the dog chewing a sock,
to the pusher, to the basket maker,
and to the clerk stacking cans of carrots
in the night.

It even comes to the boulder
in the perpetual shade of pine barrens,
to rain falling on the open sea,
to the wineglass, weary of holding wine.

Poem: "Happiness" by Jane Kenyon, from Otherwise New & Selected Poems © Graywolf Press, 1997.

November 23, 2004

Mistaken Identity

Lavafalls flowing of Piluma Pali to the seas. HVO photo

I started to blog last night when a horrendous lightning storm rocked through here knocking out power for some and scaring the poor cats to death. Once I realzed this was not going to stop I shut down the computers and sat out on the covered Lanai with my brave but trembling kitties snuggled up to me as I wrote Christmas cards and penpal letters to the beat of the thunder roaring over the ocean. It was Awesome. This is my Hawaii at her most fearsome though the photo I have on this post sort of sums awesomeness up for most people. Nothing like a errupting volcano... In fact since I didnt see the flash I thought that the volcano was popping its top and my first thought was " Oh Great Mauna Loa is going off now the property values will take a dive..." Silly me...

Woody is in the process of making an offer really a back up offer on a lovely home in Mount Vernon Ohio. Yes in these days of doing everything via the internet sight unseen, other than the lovely pics on line we were sent. If the house is at least as lovely as its pictured I will enjoy living there. A fully renovated victorian built around 1900, large home small yard, but situated so its private and has a front porch that I will do most of my living on. Like I said a back up offer, its in escrow, but the financing hurtle is looking insurmountable for these folks so we shall see. The price is so embarasingly low that I blush at the thought of announcing it.

We have had a death in the family... maybe two in a way... My mother's cousin Norma Jean Cron was like an aunt to me, and was the relation that lived the closest to my family as I was growing up. She was a young 65, (I think) and died peacefully in her sleep. The service was yesterday in California. I regret not spending more time with her and her family as an adult. I know that her religion was a difficulty for my Mom who loved her like a sister. Norma's mother was a convert to Mormonism, and her children and grand children practice that faith. Personally I am surprised that more of my family is NOT Mormon given that much of the tribe resides in Arizona with branches scattered all over the country including me in this most remote place on the planet. I wasnt notified of this event... Im ok with that

How ever I wasnt prepared when my Mom was so upset when I spoke to her on our usual sunday morning phone call. She was so upset because "Norma died"... well, I thought, she was 65 ish and these things happen. Then my Mom said "No No No, not Norma Cron, But Aunt Imas Norma..." This Norma is MY cousin the daughter of my mothers sister, several years younger than myself. My Mom was nearly hysterical about how young she was ect... and we had had little to do with this gal in all of her life as they lived so far away from us... So I tried to console her and told her that things happen for the best and that she should just relax. I asked her how she found out and she said that my brother told her...Hmmm. When I asked how he heard about it Mom said that Aunt Ima called him...

This stuck me as odd. The grieving Mother calls the nephew she hardly knows to tell him that her daughter is dead? I didnt think so. My Mother made me promise on a stack of Bibles that I would send Aunt Ima a sympathy card... I of course did nothing of the sort but waited till the intel came from my source of all family wisdom, my cousin Lyn who straightened me out on who died and when...

My brother doesnt know who died either... He didnt know beyond a name these ladies. I think that speaks for the sad state of our family relations. Nothing on him, mind you, hes not the social type and we spent very little time with family growing up or since then. So Mom asks him "Which Norma" and he doesnt know who and our family relations are reduced to nothing more than the Abbott and Costello sketch of " Whos on First?"

Then there is my Mom, who I now realize has lost her ability to rationalize what had happened...to figure it out... This lady was a huge help in taking care of her, and I will miss that help, my Mom will miss this lady that she loved. I dont understand why my Aunt failed to tell Mom herself, or all of these details... I just know that when I call here to tell her that I am comming to see her next week that I will the one to give her the sad news...

Death is a hard thing. It is hard when you realize that you will not see that person again in this life... harder still for those of us that believe that chioces are made in this life that affect the hereafter. I choose to believe that God is the Judge and He alone knows how these things play out. For me the missing the loved one in the here and now is enough sorrow.

I also need to commit to getting to know all of these that I am related to a tad bit better, if this incedent shows me anything is how little I know of these that share my blood and heritage. Just as Woody feels he failed in keeping in touch with his sister who died alone and intestate... this is an ignorance that I cannot afford to ignore any longer...

November 21, 2004

Isaiah 42

Hamakua Morning


"Behold, My Servant, whom I uphold; My chosen one {in whom} My soul delights. I have put My Spirit upon Him; He will bring forth justice to the nations.

"He will not cry out or raise {His voice,} Nor make His voice heard in the street.

"A bruised reed He will not break And a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish; He will faithfully bring forth justice.

"He will not be disheartened or crushed Until He has established justice in the earth; And the coastlands will wait expectantly for His law."

Thus says God the LORD, Who created the heavens and stretched them out, Who spread out the earth and its offspring, Who gives breath to the people on it And spirit to those who walk in it,

"I am the LORD, I have called You in righteousness, I will also hold You by the hand and watch over You, And I will appoint You as a covenant to the people, As a light to the nations,

To open blind eyes, To bring out prisoners from the dungeon And those who dwell in darkness from the prison.

"I am the LORD, that is My name; I will not give My glory to another, Nor My praise to graven images.

"Behold, the former things have come to pass, Now I declare new things; Before they spring forth I proclaim {them} to you."

Sing to the LORD a new song, {Sing} His praise from the end of the earth! You who go down to the sea, and all that is in it. You islands, and those who dwell on them.

Let the wilderness and its cities lift up {their voices,} The settlements where Kedar inhabits. Let the inhabitants of Sela sing aloud, Let them shout for joy from the tops of the mountains.

Let them give glory to the LORD And declare His praise in the coastlands.
The LORD will go forth like a warrior, He will arouse {His} zeal like a man of war. He will utter a shout, yes, He will raise a war cry. He will prevail against His enemies.

"I have kept silent for a long time, I have kept still and restrained Myself. {Now} like a woman in labor I will groan, I will both gasp and pant.

"I will lay waste the mountains and hills And wither all their vegetation; I will make the rivers into coastlands And dry up the ponds.

"I will lead the blind by a way they do not know, In paths they do not know I will guide them. I will make darkness into light before them And rugged places into plains. These are the things I will do, And I will not leave them undone."

They will be turned back {and} be utterly put to shame, Who trust in idols, Who say to molten images, "You are our gods."

Hear, you deaf! And look, you blind, that you may see.

Who is blind but My servant, Or so deaf as My messenger whom I send? Who is so blind as he that is at peace {with Me,} Or so blind as the servant of the LORD?
You have seen many things, but you do not observe {them;} {Your} ears are open, but none hears.

The LORD was pleased for His righteousness' sake To make The Law great and glorious.

But this is a people plundered and despoiled; All of them are trapped in caves, Or are hidden away in prisons; They have become a prey with none to deliver {them,} And a spoil, with none to say, "Give {them} back!"

Who among you will give ear to this? Who will give heed and listen hereafter?

Who gave Jacob up for spoil, and Israel to plunderers? Was it not the LORD, against whom we have sinned, And in whose ways they were not willing to walk, And whose law they did not obey?

So He poured out on him the heat of His anger And the fierceness of battle; And it set him aflame all around, Yet he did not recognize {it;} And it burned him, but he paid no attention.


Taken from the New American Standard Version

November 20, 2004

Cooling Trend

Its a two cat night for Woody and me...Once we throw a blanket on the bed (it was down to a chilly 60 last night. no just sleeping under the sheet) Mak and Nani come for the fun of all of us sharing the "sleeping nest" together. A bit crowded but they are so cuddly sweet!. However the joyfull purring can get so loud that it wakes me up!

Its definately fall here. I can feel the difference in the night time temperatures which is really the biggest seasonal change here. The cats are lovely with their winter coats all shiny and fluffy. They will bee lovely six months out of the year in Ohio.

Speaking of Ohio, I have not finished the photo blog, but I will go ahead and link it as I dont know how much time I will have to work on it right now. Eventually My Wide Green Fields will become my working blog once we move... there are still some pics to down load and to organize but you will get the gist of the trip and the fact that I love yellow and red trees...

Two of my friends here are talking about moving to the mainland, the job thing is dismal...the much ballyhooed 3.9 percent unemployment rate is a anomoly and not accurate. It doesnt take into account the fact that we have hordes of folks moving here with tons of money that are buying and building homes that feeds the local economy in a big way. People that are used to having little are having a lot right now, buying cars and spending their earnings, but little saving is going on. Like most building booms, this too shall pass and things will grind back up to 5-10 percent unemployment as no widgits are being made or even grown here, just houses as far as the eye can see. Its a false economy and a bit scary. I am glad for going now while we can as far as the economics goes...

I had a man in looking at the shop. He wants only the improvements... Fine. Talk to the Agent. I can sell the inventory at my leasure via EBay if necessary.

I know of several business people that are taking stock of their positions and maybe liqudating in the new year... So I do feel better that I am not cutting and running.

Cleaning house Sunday and Monday, cant wait for you, Mo, to get here... So looking forward to talking up a storm...

News Bits For This Week

Hilo Bay from 4 mile turn out Mamaaloa Hwy 

Ive not done a peice like this in a while, but I thought that you might find it interesting to read about what is going on one different islands and in different cities here in Hawaii so here are a few news briefs

From Maui... Can Paradise be loved to death? I think so and I am viewing the destruction here on the Big Island everyday. But even in protected spaces like our national parks things are getting way too crowded. I saw this at Yosemite, Denali, and at the Grand Canyon, where access has had to be restricted to preserve a fragile ecosystem, read about Haleakala here thanks to the Maui News for this one!

From Kauaii... Trouble in Paradise? For years we here in Hawaii have complained and been concerned that air travel is the only way to get between each island.At nearly 100.00 per ticket its too expensive for families to visit and for firms that must send employees back and forth... not to mention that nearly all serious medical care is done on Oahu, paitents are flying back and forth. With 9-11, the two airlines that serve us interisland nearly went bankrupt, so this is a very serious issue. We dont have a ferry system like most island nations and need one badly. Our Gov. Linda Lingle made this one of her campaign promises to at least get a ferry system going if not fully operational by the end of her first term and Mercy me shes done it. The ships are in production, and will start plying the waters between the islands by 2006. We were really looking forward to this as you could take your car between islands and two people for about 200.00 total round trip... But those that stand in the way of progress are ever at our door. Read this article from the Kauaii Island Journal, mahalo KIJ!

From East Hawaii...WE really are two sides to one island. Hula and the Hawaiian language are a cultural phenom in Japan where Hula "Halau" or schools are springing up everywhere. This total emmersion week of classes took place accross the street from us at Resturant Kaikodo.I actually had some of these ladies in the shop yesterday they were very nice, and seemed to be having a wonderful time. Read more about this here... Thanks to the East Hawaii Tribune Herald for this article

From West Hawaii... I think that everywhere in the country, there seems to be a major legal case going on the subject of land use, emmenant domain, public good vs property rights in development. Here in Hawaii over the last five years, huge tracts of land that were once used strictly for agriculture, or were part of the Sceeded Lands, (land surrendered by the deposed Queen Lilioukalani, when Hawaii was seized by the US government, supposidly to "protect"her legacy but really to control Hawaii,)are being turned over and rezoned for residential developement. I cannot begin to discribe what I have seen in the last three years, the clearing, grading and building that is goin on here seemingly with very little thought to the longterm effects on a fragile enviroment and a total lack of infrastructure. That being said I am a firm believer that if you own the land you have a right to do as you please with it as long as you are with in the laws of the land and zoning. the Hokulia Project is a development project that I think will be a watershed for developement here on the Big Island. I include it in this post as I hope to write more on this. Over a hundred homesites have been sold for nearly 80 million dollars, a golf course has been built already and the runoff is polluting one of the worlds most beautiful coastal areas. This area is rich in cultural and archalogical sites for the Native Hawaiians and there are many questions on how these sensitive sites are being handled. On the other hand, If this was such a big deal why was it approved in the first place, 20 years ago? This area is near to the place where Captain James Cook frist landed in the Hawaiian Islands and the controversy continues since that time, Progress or Paradise seems that you cant have both, read more here...

I have a few more islands but I think this is enough for one day Aloha and A Hui Hou

November 19, 2004

I Will Be Here- An Anniversary Card

"Waikoloa Sunset" Selvin Chance Photo

Tomorrow morning if you wake up
and the sun does not appear,
I will be here.

If in the dark we lose sight of love
hold my hand and have no fear
'Cause, I will be here.

I will be here
when you feel like being quiet
When you need to speak you mind
I will lisiten
And I will be here
when the laughter turned to crying
Through the winning losing and trying
We'll be together

'Cause I will be here.

November 18, 2004

The bride. Hokule'a on the happiest day of her life.... November 18,1995.

Tomorrow morning if you wake up
and the future is unclear
I will be here.

As sure as the seasons are made for change
Our lifetimes are made for years
So I will be here

I will be here
You can cry on my sholder
When the mirror tells us were older
I will hold you
And I will be here
to watch you grow in beauty
and tell you all the things you are to me
We'll be together...

I will be true to the promise I have made
To you and to The One Who gave you to me...

For I will be here....

Steven Curtis Chapman

Happy Anniversary Woody... This was by special request by Woody so I guess its Happy Anniversary to me too. Better than Halmark...

November 17, 2004

The Anniversary Gift.

Peaceful Picnic Spot

Im still laughing. Woody gave us the perfect anniversary gift. I received a 6 day all expense paid trip to LA to see my Mom. Alone. I get to see my Mom and friends on my own, and have a bit of alone time, always a welcome thing for me... He gets 6 days of no nagging, eats what he wants and does what he wants, (and he doesnt have to go to the place where his Mom died when we werent there, the same nursing home )... and can sell as much of the shop inventory at what ever price he wants without me there to bitch. I leave Dec 2 and will be back the 8th, just in time for the major holiday rush we hope. How did he do it? We were such good kids on the Ohio trip, watching our pennies that we had over 1000.00 left in that kitty. That will just cover the package air room car and some meals...I have some cash in my stash jar for fun stuff...

Its a bit of a miracle and perhaps a Divine Appointment...

Do you all get the joke? I figured this out while sitting near this area in my car eating lunch and I began to laugh so hard that the fishing guys (old retired guys that fish everyday and dont catch anthing, just stay out of the wifes hair this way) looked at me like I was crazy... But Woody has learned something from them and about me. Absence makes the heart grow fonder...

November 16, 2004

Punahele

Surf on the rocks Punalu'u Beach, Ka'u

I learned or rather learned the meaning of a word that I like to hear. I always hoped that it ment something wonderful. It is Punahele...Poo Nah Hey Ley... I thought it was "Puna"... "water from the ground" and "Hele"... to move forward... Cool....like a stream or river right?... no, its better than that...

Punahele, it turns out means "favored one" like saying "of all of my grandchildren whom I love, this one is "Punahele" the one that I am closest to, that learns my wisdom and spends time with me" This is the "one that I love most"

It also applies to places... this photo was taken at a place that I love . That even though I dont get there often, it is in my heart and a place that resonates with my spirit here on the Big Island... Punalu'u Black Sands... a beautiful place of towering surf yet small inlets where the turtles haul themselves out of the water to rest in the sun. It is Punahele to me...

I also had a thought that I am Punahele to God. I did nothing to earn this blessing but it there for me to accept and enjoy. I long to be back at the place where I can be still longer with Him and learn of Him... I too often crowd my God out and that is a great mistake. I need to really seek more of Him in these days that seem to be spinning around me like the wild surf... I need to allow His love to wash over me like the sea foam over these rocks...

November 15, 2004

Stormy Days

Stormy Seas Hilo Bay

First thanks for all the great comments that I have received in the past few days . These are very difficult days for me and I appreciate all of the help and encouragement.

I found out where to get copies of Daniel Kiwaka's book "Perpetuated in Righteousness" even if you are not a Christian, and perhaps especially for those that feel the West has done a disservice to native peoples I urge you to read this book. From a ethnopological and theological view his theories and facts are facinating.

Aloha Ke Akua

E-mail Address: alohake@ilhawaii.net

OR

Mail your request for the book along with $12.00 to

Aloha Ke Akua

HCR2 Box 6640

Kea'au, Hawai'i 96749

We have been having wild weather here in Hawaii. Now I understand that we had a "Winter Storm" meaning lots of wind rain lightining and cold while we were away in Ohio. yesterday was a lovely day the Kona (southerly) winds were blowing VOG which is the smoke from the volcano up twords us...smells like tires are burning. But then around noon the winds shifted and I could feel the difference. So I ran out and gathered up the trash and made sure that the can was secure and the wind really began to blow out of the south east hard. Brought some much needed rain and blinking power... I heard that they closed the Bayfront Hwy which is pretty normal. I just hope that the roof isnt leaking onto the floor of the store when I go in tomorrow.

I sat out on the lanai last night, writing my holiday cards (i put a letter in each one so I start before Thanksgiving) and with two fearful kitties in attendence huddled up against me I listened to the roar of the wind in the trees stuff flying around. I was only concerned once when a palm frond hit the screen, and hung up in it tearing a bit of a hole. One more item to fix before we go I guess. The rain would come crashing down like buckets then let up... You can hear it comming like a roaring train down a track!... then a hush as it subsides....

The cquoque frogs never let up, just are more subdued when the rain is pouring down then they let out a shreeking refrain as the rain lets up. It like a huge choral suite that rises and falls in a symphony of sound. Most people here hate it... the froggy singers I mean... I love it... there are three types of frogs and while the cquoque souds like its name in a semi rythmic drone (like a cricket) the other two species trill or well its more melodic than the others. Woody will hear one of the green house frogs and say ..."yup that one will get a prom date... he knows how to sing properly..." they all seem to do well in the mating dept. We are just glad that they dont show houses at night here.

We did some comparison shopping of listings here and think our house is worth every bit of 275-289K. Woody would like to get out of here today. I cant think of that now as I watch the steady unraveling of my dream. Hes becomming less sympathetic everyday about it. That bugs me.

I have a bad feeling when he talks about his former wife and how "no matter where he moves nothing changes..." WE have had this conversation many times and on two landmasses. "Its not about moving, its about YOU, dear..." Im not sure that he gets it. He dragged his poor ex wife around from house to house trying to find an ideal situation. This is far from that situation but I do think we need to have a bit of a heart to heart about where we are going and the expectations of each to the other.. Perhaps that is appropriate conversation for the anniversary meal out we will be having this week...

I am open to where I go as I am sure this is not the final place we will end up. I have some ideas of my own and will be looking into them as time goes by but for now the wide green fields of Ohio beckon and I am content with that.

Perpetuated In Righteousness- A Spiritual History of Hawaii Part Two

Stanined Glass windows showing King Kalakaua and Queen Ka'ahumanu of Hawaii St Andrews Cathedral Honolulu, Selwn Chance photo

From the conversion of Queen Ka'ahumanu through the ranks of Hawaiian Royalty that became Believers God worked to bring a relationship of healing and hope. The Missionaries were human and made errors, at least to our way of thinking, but they also brought the written language to Hawaii. A language so well done that it is used by linguists as an example of the best way to reduce a new toungue to writing. They also brough western music to a people that would embrace it with delight (until the comming of the Haolie, Hawaiians didnt sing as we know it the only chanted and it wasnt very musical)



OPUKAHA'IA

In 1809, ten years before the overthrow of the kapu system, an orphan from the wars of Kamehameha was offered passage to the United States by an American sea captain. He signed on as a crew member of this ship and was given the English name of Henry by the American sea captain. This orphan's Hawaiian name was Opukaha'ia.

Six years earlier, when he was just a boy of ten, Opukaha'ia had seen his mother and father murdered in front of him. As he was trying to flee with his baby brother on his back, a warrior threw a spear at them that killed his baby brother. Opukaha'ia wanted to flee the horrors he experienced in the Hawai'i of his day and to learn about the big and wonderful world beyond the sea.

Even though he was still a boy, Opukaha'ia knew the Hawaiian gods well. He had been apprenticed to his uncle who was the high kahuna of the island of Hawai'i. He had learned the rituals of the kahuna in his uncle's luakini heiau on Kealakekua Bay, the same bay Captain Cook had landed at nearly thirty years earlier.

Later, when Henry was introduced to the One True God, he came to realize the absurdity of his old gods. He said, "Hawai'i gods! They wood, burn. Me go home, put 'em in a fire, burn 'em up. The no see, no hear, no anything. We make them, Our God, (looking up.) He make us." Opukaha'ia accepted Jesus Christ with a glad heart. Opukaha'ia had found the One True God who was kind and merciful, who loved him, and who even sent His son Jesus to die for him.

Eventually ending up in Connecticut, Henry was found weeping on the steps of Yale college because he desired so much to learn. He was taken in by Timothy Dwight, the president of Yale college, and began his western education. Henry's rigorous training for memorizing chants and genealogies at the heiau, turned out to be a blessing in disguise. His sharpened mind learned quickly and the Americans were greatly impressed. Within a few years Henry became quite a scholar, acquiring the equivalent of a Ph. D. degree today.

His great love for God and for his people gave Henry a burning desire to share the Good News of Jesus Christ with his people. He desired to set them free from the oppressive gods and system he had known so well. Henry went to Foreign Mission School to become a missionary to his people. He also traveled throughout New England giving impassioned pleas for churches to send missionaries to Hawai'i.

Opukaha'ia translated the Book of Genesis into Hawaiian directly from the Hebrew. He found that the Hebrew language was similar to his own and, therefore, easier to translate into Hawaiian than the English. He had begun work on Hawaiian grammar, dictionary and spelling books when he fell fatally ill.

Opukaha'ia died praying and weeping for his people, but also with the peace that comes from knowing the abiding love of his God. However, Henry's life was not in vain, God would answer his prayer, his people would hear the gospel of Iesu Kristo.

Henry's Memoirs, published in 1819, became the best selling book in New England. It greatly inspired and helped to finance and staff the first Mission Board to native peoples. Up until that time, many people in New England believed that the "heathen" could not be educated and therefore could not accept Christ. By proving to be an exemplary scholar and Christian, this young man shattered both of these misconceptions.

Henry's life not only opened up missions to the Hawaiian people, but to Native Americans and other ethnic groups as well! The first mission to Hawai'i departed Boston in October of 1819; the same time that the Hawaiian people on the other side of the globe were overthrowing their old gods! How wondrously the One True God works!

THE MISSION BEGINS



On October 23, 1819, the day before the Makahiki began and just twenty days after the Hawaiian people broke the bondage of the kapu system, the missionaries set sail from Boston Harbor. With them were four Hawaiians from the mission school. They sailed from the other side of the world, leaving their comfortable homes and pleasant and secure lifestyle. They had given up their pleasant lives and their families to spend five months and 18,000 miles in cramped quarters on the brig Thaddeus. They did all this to minister to the Hawaiian people, a people they did not even know.

In late March of 1820, the missionaries arrived. Although full of human faults, al the historians agree that the missionaries had come to Hawai'i with the good of the Hawaiian people in their hearts. Robert Louis Stevenson wrote, "With all their deficiency of candor, humor, and common sense, the missionaries are the best and most useful whites in the Pacific." In fact, the Hawaiian people were not so much won over by the teachings of the Love of God or the fear of damnation as they were by the goodness of the missionaries who sacrificed themselves daily to serve the needs of the people.

With the later group of missionaries came another group of Tahitians. This group of Tahitians did not come to rule or to bring death but to serve the Hawaiian people as missionaries of Jesus Christ. Tahitians, being introduced to the gospel of Jesus Christ before the Hawaiians, were brought to help spread the gospel. This was because their language was so similar to Hawaiian. This new group of Tahitians came with the knowledge and power to destroy the evil religion of Pa'ao who had come centuries before them.

Haili Church Hilo Selvn Chance photo


I was unable to find a photo or drawing of the original Haili Church that was located in the Waiakea Homesteds and was leveled in the tsunami of 1946.

Described as "one of the finest churches in the Islands" in 1857 when the cornerstone was laid, Haili Church was established in Hilo by New England missionaries. Henry Opukahaia, a young Hawaiian was instrumental in establishing this church in hopes that it would end fighting among his people that had taken the lives of members of his family.

Originally planned to be a stone structure, it was built of timber gathered from the Haili Kulamanu forest area when bedrock could not be reached even after digging six feet down. Following a simplified version of Greek Revival used by the New England church in the 1800's, Haili Church features double door entrances separating men from women and a square central bell tower. Voluntary contributions were received to pay for the bell, cast in New England.

Reverends David Belden Lyman (1832-84) and Titus Coan (1836-82) were early missionaries of this Congregational church who influenced and changed Hawaiian culture.

This church became a major center for religious and social activity. By 1869 the number of attendees had swelled to nearly 7000,on a regular sunday. Many Church historian feel that Haili was the largest evangelical body in the Western Hemispher at this time. The Royal Family attended this house of worship when on the Big Island, sailing from Kona and staying at their home in Hilo.

This is a recent photo of the church. It has a membership of about 500 currently. The church also is home to a fine Christian Day School.

November 14, 2004

Sacrificial Platform. The native Hawaiians that are more radical do not acknowledge the suffering of the people under the "Kapu" religious system. They still have ceremonies, and bring cooked meat and produce to be given in "sacrifice" on a platform like this one at the base of the Pu'ukohola Heiau. They talk with nostalgia of the"good old days before the "haolies" and the missionaries came and corrupted our way of life" They fail to see that the "way of life" they were longing for was short and brutal for 99% of Hawaiians. Jesus is the Liberator from such brutality in religion.

Perpetuated In Righteousness- A Spiritual History of Hawaii Part One

Wahinie with Ipu

Prior to comming to Hawaii, I became familiar with the writings/teaching of Dan Kikawa. He has done extensive research into the history and culture of the Hawaiian and other "Proto Polynesian" peoples. Many of his theories on the migration of the ProtoPolynesians is subject to great debate and theologians debate his thoughts and his positions on the use of the stars by the Divine as a way to communicate to His people and other things that are fodder of many other days blogging. I will say this. Christian Native Hawaiians that I have met and discussed this subject with are adamant that the oldest stories and teachings given by the "Kapuna" or elders very closely resemble Biblical stories in the early Old Testiment. It is not believed that this is due to a cultural contamination from an outside source. Hawaii was not "discovered" by the Spanish or other "Christian" nations, and these legends or widespread from the Maori of New Zealand, to Hawaii and much of Polynesia.

I give you excerpts from Dr. Kikawa's book as he tells the story best and with my thanks! Mahalo Nui and Aloha ke Akua! (Thank you much and may God Bless You)




SPIRITUAL HISTORY OF HAWAII

The Following Is From

Daniel I. Kikawa's Book

PERPETUATED IN RIGHTEOUSNESS

With the permission of the author

the following consists of excerpts

from Mr. Kikawa's book. For brevity, we have omitted

the references as cited in his book.

The author (Daniel Kikawa) was privileged to have an interview with "Auntie" Malia Craver. Auntie Malia spoke Hawaiian as a first language and learned many things from her kupuna (elders). Her mentor was the most respected Hawaiian authority of modern times, Mary Kawena Pukui. Antie Malia told the author that although her kupuna worshipped the Supreme Being, 'Io, daily and taught her to do the same, they rarely mentioned their belief in 'Io to those outside of the 'ohana (family). Until this day, Auntie Malia does not speak of 'Io unless asked specifically about him and only if she can see that the person will not belittle her God. She said that when Christianity came to Hawai'i, there was confusion in the 'ohana because they already had a Supreme Being. In an interview in the 'Iolani Newspaper, Malia related that her ancestors said, "Let us go to this church and listen to their minister. If it is good and they are right in their teaching about their powerful God of the universe, then we will keep that same God. The reason that we have a God like theirs. If they are exaggerating that their God is better than our God, then they are wrong. We Hawaiians have had a powerful and all-knowing God from the beginning and until today." Her kupuna accepted Jehovah but never told the missionaries about 'Io because they knew that their God would be ridiculed and called the devil by the missionaries. However, she would hear her kupuna say while praying, Jehovah you are 'Io."

The Voyaging Canoe "Hokule'a" A copy of the Great Canoes that sailed from Tahiti to the Hawaiian Islands, using astral navigation and other methods that we are only now just starting to understand.

Perpetuated In Righteousness Day One cont.


THE INVADER PA'AO AND HIS

CRUEL FOREIGN GODS

Historically, religions and truths have often been twisted and changed by unscrupulous leaders to gain personal power and control over people. Throughout history, new "gods" and new doctrines have popped up concocted by minds bent on the domination and control of others.

This was no different in Hawai'i.

PA'AO

Although every society has its problems, the evidence shows that the Hawaiians remembered the One Supreme God and worshiped him in relative peace until the priest pa'ao came. Fornander writes of this period that "… the kapus were few and the ceremonials easy; that human sacrifices were not practiced' and cannibalism unknown; and that government was more of a patriarchal than of a regal nature." The historian Rudy Mitchell, writes that Pa'ao was a kahuna nui (high priest), ali'i nui (high royalty), famous navigator and a sorcerer of great power. He was an ali'i nui of the sacred and powerful royal family of Ra'iatea. Pa'ao was from Vavau (Bora Bora). In ancient times, the royal house of Vavau conquered the other islands of western Tahiti and established themselves at Ra'iatea. Although this family knew of 'lo, they established a new oppressive religious system with its chief place at Taputaputea.

This royal family conquered with great numbers of warriors dedicated to naval tactics. They had a large fleet of war canoes built for speed and silence. They are said to also have designed paddles and paddling techniques to be swift and silent. It was with this technique and their special canoes that they surprised and conquered the other islands of western Tahiti. They were given the name Porapora i te nuu ta rua (first born of the fleet that strikes both ways). Malia Craver was told by her elders that Pa'ao brought many warrior with him. He probably conquered the Hawaiian Islands in the same way his family did in Tahiti, with stealth and skilled warriors.

Most historians estimate that Pa'ao came from Havai'i around A.D. 1300. He arrived with his warriors, priests (kahunas) and new rulers (ali'i). Havai'i was the ancient name Ra'iatea of the Society Group. This group of islands is more commonly known by the main island of the group, Tahiti. (The author has elected to call these islands Tahiti in this book.) It seems that the earlier voyagers from Tahiti integrated more peacefully with the Menehune. Apparently, there was intermarriage with the Menehune inhabitants and the diminishing of class distinction between the Tahitian ali'i and the commoners.

The legends say that when Pa'ao arrived, he regarded the high chief of Hawai'i, kapawa, a degenerate. The priests and ali'i were not performing the rituals they had formerly performed in Tahiti to retain mana (divine power). They did not build the necessary heiaus (temples), performing the necessary human sacrifices, or wear the red feather malo (loincloth-the symbol of royalty in Ra'iatea) of kings.

Pa'ao saw islands ripe for conquer. There was no powerful royal house or warriors trained for conquest. He returned to Ra'iatea to bring a new line of ali'i

with untainted mana Pa'ao returned to Hawai'i not only with a great many of warriors but with the ali'i, Pili. Through conquest and intermarriage with the older lines, Pili became powerful in the islands.

The Pu'ukohola Heiau, near Kawaihae, Kohalla Dedicated to the war God Ku, this was the last of the large "heiau" or temples built by royal command. King Kamehameha was said to be ordered by the gods to build this and sacrifice (humans), to Ku, for doing this he would be given control of all of the Hawaiian Islands. This huge structure built by slave labor was compleated in two years by continous round the clock labor. Stones were passed hand to hand from Waikoloa 20 miles away. The king and his cheifs worked along side the slaves. It is estimated that nearly 3000 people were sacrificed at the dedication ceremonies.


Pepetuated In Righteousness Day One cont

Pa'ao, as the high priest of the new royalty also became powerful. To consolidate his power, pa'ao instituted human sacrifices and changed the Hawaiians' religious rituals. He built the first laukini (human sacrifice) heiau (temple) on the Big Island (Hawai'i) at Waha'ula. Fornander wrote that " . . . there was a time before that, when human sacrifices were not only not of common occurrence, and an established rule, but were absolutely prohibited. Kapu ke kanaka na Kane, 'sacred is the man to Kane' . . . "

Pa'ao instituted the oppressive kapu (tapu or taboo) system and the worship of elemental spirit gods such as Pele. Fornander says that Pele worship in Hawai'i is only subsequent to this migratory period. The Pele cult was unknown to the purer faith of the older inhabitants and her name does not even appear in the creation accounts.

Pa'ao also changed the benign god, Ku, into a vengeful and bloodthirsty god of war. He also brought the Kanaloa (Tangaloa) Cult from Tahiti, elevating Kanaloa to a major creation god. The class separation between the Ali'i with their mana and the common Hawaiian again became a huge gulf.

Fornander wrote, "In the polity of government initiated during this period, and strengthened as ages rolled on, may be noted the hardening and confirming the divisions of society, the exaltation of the nobles and the increase of their prerogatives, the separation and immunity of the priestly order, and the systematic setting down, if not actual debasement of the commoners, the Maka'ainana."

What most people today regard as the religious system of the old Hawaiian people, was not their true religion --- it was a foreign religion introduced by the invader Pa'ao.

Pa'ao's voyages from Tahiti were the last from other Polynesian islands. The 19th century Tahitian scholar, Teuira Henry, wrote that there formerly was an alliance of Polynesian nations which ended around 600 years ago. This alliance ended because of a dispute at an international meeting of navigators. He said that at the great marae (temple) of taputapuatea in Raiates, a Maori was murdered and a curse was put on the marae by one of their priests. Navigators from the different Polynesian nations never met again. By the time Captain Cook arrived, voyaging canoes were only a dim and distant memory.

THE KAPU SYSTEM

The ali'i convinced the common people that they had inherited divine power (mana) and were divinely chosen by the gods to rule. The kapu system was structured around the concept of protecting the mana. Complex kapus (laws) had to be kept to keep the mana intact and maintain its balance in nature for the land to be fruitful. Every aspect of Hawaiian life was controlled by strict requirements to maintain the balance and harmony of the mana. While there were many laws that encouraged the wise use of resources, and so forth, the social/political aspects of the kapu system provided an open door for abuse. Although ali'i usually kept the kapus, they did this because the belief in mana and the kapus was what kept them in power. High ali'i were never put to death for breaking kapus, although commoners were sometimes sacrificed to correct the "imbalance in the mana" caused by an ali'i's sin.

The Hawaiian people endured much suffering and bondage under this new religious system. The ali'i and kahuna had total power in this system and the common people had no control or say about who came to power. It was very rare indeed for the common people to overthrow an ali'i, and only another ali'i could take his place. Although there were exemptions, the majority of the ali'i and kahunas used their power for personal gain and not for the good of the people. The kapu system was used to keep control and wealth within the select ali'i/kahuna group. Laws strictly controlled every aspect of life.

For instance, kapus dictated that men and women had to eat separately and were restricted to only certain foods. Common women faced death for eating bananas, coconuts and other foods. Common men also faced death for eating certain fish and other foods. If a commoner stepped on an ali'i's land (even if the boundary was not well marked), or if an ali'i's shadow fell on him, he was also put to death.

An ali'i could take commoners who committed any of these "sins" and use them for human sacrifice or even bait for shark hunting. There were ovens for burning humans at Punchbowl and Waikiki. Commoners were drowned at Kewalo Basin (Honolulu) for breaking kapus. Human heads, of those offered in sacrifice, were put on stakes that lined the Pakaka temple at the foot of Fort Street (Downtown Honolulu). At the heiau located at the foot of Diamond Head, men had their limbs broken with clubs, their eyes scooped out, and then were left bleeding and maimed for three days. They were later clubbed to death with blows to the shoulders rather than to the head, thus prolonging the suffering before death.

The common people owned no land under the new religious system, in fact, they had no rights and nothing they could call their own. An ali'i could take anything he wanted from a commoner: his food, his belongings, his favorite pig, his children, or even his wife. The ali'i could "tax" most of a commoner's food away and force him to work on his building projects. It is estimated that two-thirds of what the common people produced was taken by high ali'i, chiefs and kahunas. In fact, the common people were so maltreated that when the first anthropologists arrived, they thought that the Hawaiians were comprised of two different races - the huge ali'i and the scrawny common people!

Sometimes the kapus were bent to show "mercy", if one could call it that. A five year old girl who are a banana was treated "mercifully" by the kahunas; they didn't kill her but only scooped out one of her eyes. When the high ali'i, Kapi'olani, was a young girl, she ate a banana. Because she was a high ali'i, they did not put her to death. Instead, the kahuna took her favorite servant, a child, and strangled him on the altar of the heiau instead. Many years later, Kapi'olani asked the kahuna who had strangled her young friend why he had done this. The kahuna replied, "Those were dark days, though we priests knew better all the time.” The kahuna continued, "It was power we sought over the minds of the people, to influence and control them." Kapi'olani cried out, "Oh why did not the Christians come sooner and teach us better things!' She then hid her face in her hands and wept.

One of the most shocking revelations to this author has been that Pa'ao, and his Tahitian kahuna and ali'i, knew about 'Io! Considering this, the words of the Kapi'olani's kahuna spoke are even more grievous --- ". . . we priests knew better all the time. It was power we sought over the minds of the people, to influence and control them.”

Even after Western contact, the common people were forced to harvest sandalwood like slaves until their bodies became deformed from carrying the heavy logs. A famine arose when thousands of commoners, forced by the ali'i to harvest sandalwood, could not tend their farms

THE GOD KU

Not only were these harsh requirements put on the common people but they were constantly drafted into armies to fight when the ali'i wanted more power. Captured commoners were used as slaves or for sacrifice. The Hawaiian people were also decimated by these wars. By the time of Kamehameha, there had been some 300 years of nearly constant warfare.

John Young, Kamehameha's trusted foreign advisor, said in 1826 of the conditions he had observed during his forty-nine years in Hawaii, "I have known thousands of defenseless human beings cruelly massacred in their exterminating wars. I have seen multitudes . . . offered in sacrifice to their idol gods . . . "

The god Ku, and the new system, had severely oppressed the Hawaiian people.

Through all this oppression, the common people, the maka'ainana, retained great Aloha in their hearts. Their time of freedom from this oppressive system and cruel gods was soon to come.

KAMEHAMEHA

A young warrior named Kamehameha rose from the ranks of the ali'i. He used the technology of the white man to conquer and unify the islands of Hawai'i. By unifying the Hawaiian Islands, King Kamehameha played a vital role in the maka'ainanas' coming freedom from the kapu system.

Stairway to hell, steps to the "luakini" the area of sacrifice. There are still ceremonies held here, and a woman that is a direct lineal decentdent of Pa'ao, still has nominal control of this site, even though it is a part of the National Park system! These stairs were booby trapped and I walked up to them but did not step on them. My being on the heiau mount itself would have likely upset some Native Hawaiians. But I wanted to place myself in the steps of the condemned and see the real "Old Hawaii" Woody stayed below near the area where "commoners" place their "offerings".

Perpetuated in Righteousness Day One cont


THE BONDAGE OF THE CRUEL GODS IS BROKEN

Finally, on October 3, 1819, six months after the death of Kamehameha the Great, the bondage of the kapu system was broken. This day was the first kapu day announcing the coming Makahiki, the sacred days of Lono, the God of Peace. Two brave women, wives of Kamehameha the Great, Ka'ahumanu and Ke'opuolani, and the new king, Liholiho (Kamehameha II), openly broke the kapu by eating together at a formal state occasion.

The Hawaiian people were in a state of shock! This was an undeniable public act of defiance. It sent an unmistakable message; the kapu system was no longer honored by the king and the highest ali'i in the land.

These three highest ali'i were supported by Kamehameha's prime minister, Kalaimoku, and also the highest kahuna in the land, Hewahewa, who was a direct descendant of Pa'an. Hewahewa was the first one to set torch to a heiau! Hewahewa also stated, "I knew the wooden images of deities, carved by our own hands, could not supply our wants, but worshipped them because it was a custom of our fathers . . . My thought has always been, there is one only great God, dwelling in the heavens." Ke'opyolani, the highest ali'i in the land said, "Our gods have done us no good, they are cruel."

Liholiho sent messengers to all the districts of Hawai'i ordering the heiaus desecrated and the images of the gods overthrown.

Contrary to popular belief, the missionaries did not force the Hawaiian people to desecrate their heiaus and destroy the images of their gods. The Hawaiian people, following the lead of the ali'i, rose up and broke the bondage of that evil system on their own.! The overthrow of the kapu system happened six month before the missionaries arrived!

The One True God, whom the Hawaiian people had worshiped before the coming of Pa'ao and the kapu system, was sovereignly preparing his people to return to Him!

November 11, 2004

Freedom is Never Free - A Veteren's Day Remembrance

Rifle Boots and Helmet Memorial Service for a fallen hero.


Freedom Is Never Free


They tell me
'Freedom is never free.'
I know that-
More than most realize.
Freedom cost us more
Than we should have to give.
Freedom cost us blood.
It cost us the lives
Of our fathers,
Our sons,
Our brothers.

But while freedom is never free,
Remember-
It has been bought at great price,
And so is a thing of great value.
We must defend it,
From those who would take it away.
The defense of our freedoms
Will cost us-
More than we wish to pay.
But we must pay, to defend,
For if we try to make freedom free,
We forget-
True freedom is never free.

James Grengs

In Answer

Sky Pathways

You know, I hear such anguish in your postings about leaving the island. Two halves of your soul, and each wanting a different direction on the compass. What it boils down to is very simple - money. Everyone spouts the tired crap about how money is not everything - but just try and live without it. If you and Woody had a small fortune put aside to live on, then the island would be the paradise that we all dream of. Without it, for the everyday working man, the island becomes a prison. It is no different here in Texas or any of the other 50 states mainland. When you have to work 8-5, five days a week, 51 weeks out of the year, and worry monthly about how to pay the bills, it really doesn't matter where you are living. Life becomes a drudge, just goes with the territory of not being born a Platinum Spoon Child. Just my take on things at the moment.
Cowtown Pattie

I started to post a comment to this but feel the need to do two things, Thank Pattie for her compassion, and for grasping the truth of the situation , because so many dont. ...We have had a running dialogue for the last week or two about it and I want to blog it... first my comment

thanks I am afraid that this is true... We had a good life in CA, but I dont know if it would have stayed good as these things changed...

9-11-01...

my great well paying PT job no longer exists as the Credit Union I was working for eliminated the dept in 2002... Im not sure what I would have done with myself at that point.

My Mother would have required my constant attention and working even part time would have been impossible, it was getting that way before we left and she was still living on her own.

Woody's Mom died, and with her, went the Estate payments that hed been getting for years... 25%of our income or all of our extra money ended. I dont think we would ever have made it without it, for those first 6 years. Woody is just now undertanding this. Its not all Hawaii, its his inability to really earn a living. Hes an average guy but has always earned a living selling or doing CSR work and has no manual trade. Hes worked but I dont think hes ever earned more than 28k a year (I was at 40K and the "breadwinner" when I had my health breakdown at 35, just after we were married... its now questionable at this point how much work I can do or what...)We live with basics now, a very basic life, no cable,cel phone, going out or health insurance, 10 year old cars that are ok but scary, thank God they have held up so well with no maitainance...

Woody is living with broken dentures, high blood pressure and untreated diabetes as of Nov 1 thanks to his creep employer... and I well I know that I have some major issues... but its better that I dont know too much right now. I need insurance first.

Dear Friends, there will be money soon. Woody has a legacy comming from his sister that passed away a year ago and the estate was in probate before they found us in July. There will be funds and its a large sum, at least to me, most of which is well invested. Thats why there was any left at all... 4/5 of the Estate was lost mismanaged, taxed or paid out in fees because of a familiy misunderstanding, If Woody had received the whole amount we would be... well... it could provide the missing "extra" wed need out of the intrest alone, and provide a secure retirement if there is such a thing any more...as it is if the market grows steady we will have a bit of a nest egg but we expect to always have to work at something...

Our home is still escalating in value at an incredible rate. Its nearly tripled in value in the three years we have owned it and we have people crusing up and down the street looking at it. I feel like roadkill being stalked by a vulture...

Yes, this is the "Ark", that I spoke of a few weeks ago, a means to leave Hawaii no matter what.

Yes, its holiday time and I am doing ok with the store not great but we shall see how things go. If Azure Seas doesnt sell for at least the tenant improvements by the end of the sales agreement with the agent I will place it on Ebay for bid. Hey its something and you would be amazed at how well that works. In the mean time I hope to get enough in the sales of the inventory to pay off debts (not many thankfully) and put cash in the bank for retreading myself where ever I go. If we go to Mansfield, I will persue jewelry repair again as there is a need for people in the many stores in the Ohio area. (they recruit through the school)or I may try something else. Im adaptable...

Which brings me to my husband... 55, fat, white and confused about what he should do next. I dont know what to say to him about it anymore... A year ago I was so angry with him for his passiveness, now I have not the energy to flog him emotionally anymore.

When I was 26, a mental paitent, clingy, dependent... I was forced out on my own, and I made it. It was hard. I needed 2.5 dates a week and did a lot of free munchies happy hours to stay alive. But I did it and with in 5 years I was a homeowner on my own... I must say this. I dont know if under the present economic circumstances I could still do that. I know that Woody would never have made it. He always had roommates and help from Mom and Dad. I lived alone and from the first weeks that I had a job, it was open season on my earnings. Always they wanted money, my parents did...on the other hand... I found bags of groceries on my doorstep..(I know that it was my divorce lawyer and his wife, who were also my first Christian Friends...)

Woody cannot comprehend the struggle. God must know this as He gave him a bail out AGAIN. not that I am not greatful. I dragged us to the back room of the shop yesterday when the lawyer called and explained how things had worked out in probate court. We prayed, thanking God. I want to believe Woody was sincere, I know that I was... This is a bonefide answer to prayer miracle. Woody just expected God to help like a child, I groaned for this in agony of spirit... Who has more faith?

Pattie is right... Money is the necessary grease to the wheels of life. Just try to live without it. That aint living that is existing, I want to live. I dont mind the 8-5 5 day a week job But I resent the 8-7 6 day a week job(s) you must work here if you are to make it, and so do a lot of other people. With the high price of real estate comes higher taxes. People were calling into the governors radio show this morning angry about "how you work so hard now you gotta work harder and where does it stop?" Woody said to the radio "when they have killed you by crushing the life out of you, by robbing you of your childrens growing up, your retirement, and in many cases running you off your ancestral lands for taxes..." I emailed this to Gov Lingle. Its true of all of us, not just Hawaii...

Where does it end? How do you retirees live? How do you parents of little ones do it?
How do you get the right job that you can do to earn enough to make a living? Somehow I have missed the boat as I have "retreaded" four times since highschool and I am 42, and Im going to be unemployed in 3 months?

We are going to Ohio or someplace like it with a lower standard of living and decent wages. Median income there is 40K. If we have no bills we can live on 15k, we did that here last year. maybe if I am somewhere else things will be better... I dont know anymore...

Where should we go? Any suggestions?

November 09, 2004

Ground Zero

The Big Island's own Ground Zero...The Crater... Pu'u O'o Vent of Kilauea volcano Hawaii Volcanoes National Park HVO photo

I have used the term "Ground Zero" for much of my life. For nearly all of my growing up years I lived in the shadow of the huge complex of buildings that were the hub of the creative force of the Gemini, Apollo and Space Shuttle programs. Square miles of huge buildings that housed the NASA Offices as well as assembly plants and laboratories for North American Aviation, then Rockwell Intl now its been subdivided and houses the huge Kaiser Permanete facility as well as Los Angeles County offices and a number of large warehouse and distribution firms... In fact my last job in the International Shipping business was in a building that housed a R&D facility that my Dad had an office in during his final working days. The people there found it as touching as I did given the story and of course the subsequent ending of both of our careers in the same spot. It was our personal "Ground Zero"...

But it was also a literal one as well. After his retirement Dad and I would sometimes take a walk together on a summer afternoon to the store to get things for dinner, and a soda, and we would pass by the parking lots, by then in the early 1970's thinly populated with cars. I today dont remember what prompted the question, but we were given to mature discussion about the news of the day and I asked about what would happen if the Russians dropped a bomb on us... I remember him stopping and looking at me and pausing, then we walked to one of the open now unguarded gates and he took me inside a bit and said,".... look around you what do you see?" I told him that I saw what was left of his old employer, the empty buildings and the parking lots. He then said that "The Russians do not think that these buildings are empty... They do not trust us, and if the terrible day comes when they feel they must bomb us, this place is a target...a "Ground Zero" like Hiroshima... I know it is... You will feel nothing and it wont hurt and all will be well for you will be with God..." And we walked on. I didnt think any more about it.

10 years later, in the midst of President Reagan's showdown with the Russians, we learned that what my Father had said was correct. From Pt. Magu to Coronado Island was one long string of known targets and that evacuation was not possible. This made national news as the movie "the day after" was being shown on TV and everyone was getting all crazy about it... I wasnt crazy, for after all I had lived with the knowledge that I lived at "Ground Zero" all of my life. I wasnt phased a bit.

I think that has helped me over the years to deal with the natural disasters of life. Earthquakes mostly, You live on a series of major faults all of your life, so what is a bit of shaking, although I must admit that the earthquakes here on the Big Island have a peculiar flavor that is a touch scary... they just seem a touch more...violent the motion a bit more jolting than your basic California variety. Maybe its the closeness to the epicenter. a 3.2 is pretty darn big if you are sitting right on top of it...

Our agent for the house tells us of selling property sight unseen to people on the mainland and telling them "folks, that pahoehoe (smooth lava) that your home is built on is only 40 years old, a milisecond in the geologicl clock... yes that white plume is steam rising out of your pond, heated by a steam vent... Your power is geothermal...how is it generated, well the worlds most active volcano is just down the street...sign this waiver that you understand this and have it notarized..." and they still freak out once they move here and see it... By then all of the waivers have been signed and are months old. (not to mention the waiver you sign that you understand that your peaceful tropical paradise is infested with a tiny frog no bigger than a dime that SHREAKS a irritating repetative call at 100dbls every night as they look for mates. I like them, most people go crazy listening to this racket.I think they should have a waiver for the possible heart attack that you might have when food goes up double digits like it did again this past week!)Like me with the Bomb, you take the word of a knowledgeable person that all will be well and go forward, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. Like a lot of things we thought about this place, the thought of Kilauea being only 10 miles away isnt nearly as upsetting as the tales we were told that "there are plenty of little jobs available, people work if they want to" what they failed to tell us is that we need to be related to cousin Kimo or forget about it.

This is another personal "Ground Zero" for me. I listened to Woody try to explain to yet another of his incredulous friends that he fell in love with Ohio and wants to move there and I can hear through the phone "are you nuts???" I understand. I went through the same thing when we moved here.." Gee we are sorry that you feel so bad but your Mom needs you and the Bible says that we must "honor" our parents..." there was a huge debate by my friends on the level of selfishness I was exhibiting. This is stacking up to be another one by Woody's long time pals thinking that hes spent too long in the sun. Thats because their Hawaii experience is limited to stints at the Four Seasons, and the hardest they have had to work here is on the back nine in a stiff wind at the Kings Course at Waikoloa.

But I hear the enthusiasim of Woody and that is really cool to me. He has been so down for so long and the crushingness of the "Ground Zero" experience of trying to make a living here and failing having to sell things and realizing that we were trapped here, that was devestating. He feels no pain at leaving and if we could sell it all tomorrow hed do it. I still feel like something is being ripped out of me, and I cant believe that I will soon be leaving here forever...

November 08, 2004

Ea Mana

Windy Dawn, Fire on the Beaches HVNP Photo

There is something about this place... As I feel it beating me down I feel this strength rising up inside of me and around me. I know this is God holding me up during this trial, but the Hawaiians have a word for it... It is Mana, Power from the land, from the living breathing spirit of Hawaii...

I see this less from the "Hawaii" perspective as I know that God is all around us and His spirit is on the move not just in my life but in the world even though we cannot see it it is there. I have felt the "Mana" in many places and situations throughout my life and travels...

Pslam 125

Those who trust in the LORD Are as Mount Zion, which cannot be moved but abides forever.
As the mountains surround Jerusalem, So the LORD surrounds His people From this time forth and forever.
For the scepter of wickedness shall not rest upon the land of the righteous, So that the righteous will not put forth their hands to do wrong.
Do good, O LORD, to those who are good And to those who are upright in their hearts.
But as for those who turn aside to their crooked ways, The LORD will lead them away with the doers of iniquity. Peace be upon Israel.

November 05, 2004

Meakanu

Mauna Kea Morning Near Hakalau Hawaii

As we were driving to town this morning we were able to catch the little program " Hawaiian Word of the Day" and todays word was "Meakanu" a potted or house plant as opposed to Wao nahele, "planted things" or "jungle"... As the gal that does the little show said " We must differentiate between a potted plant and the forest..."

I said "Yeah" I am Meakanu, I have not been rooted in this place at all.Now I am being moved to a new spot. Its looking like a no turn back now as Woody got the word officially that he is no longer wanted on the Kona side. Can you imagine working for people that, use you the way that they used him and now that his usefullness then dumped him like dirt. It makes me so mad... He goes to unemployment tomorrow could be a God send as they might send him to training. That would be great...

We had some business in the store. I feel like a double minded wimp, rethinking this everytime we make a sale, but I know that is normal, but it feels wierd, like I am cutting and running.

Worked on the ohio pics tonight and I hope to have them posted soon and to those that found me all I can say is stay tuned, It wont be a high tech thing thats for sure. But it will be fun

Bloom where you are planted is the wise old motto, Its the best way to live..,I have tried and wish for the up teenth time ....

Side note, I fell asleep at the switch last night... Will try to write a little earlier tonight!

November 03, 2004

You're Joking Right?

luxuriant Jungles by the Seas, Keaukaha, south Hilo Hawaii

"You're putting me on... Ohio?...Why?"

"We LEFT there to escape, the snow, the bugs, the cold,...You'll hate it"

"you're giving up Hawaii, paradise, palm trees and hula girls?..."

"they are crazy...Im telling you...They cant know what they are in for"

"You will live to regret it..."

This is the response we get from the few, mostly visitors, that we pick the brains of about Ohio, as we meet them. A man from Washington State but raised in Ohio was more concerned about snow and no jobs. He's a construction guy, in his mid 50's and is working here for a while buying land and getting his dream home built. His wife is fully entrenched in Washington and while she has visited a few times in the nearly a year of his sojourn, I get the feeling she's not impressed with the Big Island.

A Senior lady, active 60ish, from the Oregon Central Coast, but has spent much of her life in So Cal, came into the store and told us her story. She is currently living in East Hawaii to assist a friend in a publishing project and is or was contemplating a move here part time... the lack of Condos and the filth not to mention the constant rain is making her think twice. But when we told her that we were thinking about the Upper Midwest and specifically Ohio she thought that we were...well...she wished us well . " Its cold and grey and why would you go there" After a bit of conversation she understood that our drive to be in a place of acceptance and perhaps nurture is paramount. I see Hilo through her eyes, and I am just as disgusted as she is... The locals either dont care or they dont have the resources to care about the homeless and the drugs. They fling their trash about and whine about "how we haolies are exploiting the 'aina." there is money but no civic will to fix the infrastructure problems that will bring a crisis in lack of water, roads and hospitals...These are as good a reason to move on. She sees it and so do we...

WE just hate to tell bad stuff as we believe that everyone needs to dream. But we see ourselves in these Malahini (newcomers) and we know that they are infected with the dream... I pray that they do well. I remember that when we first came we refused to listen to those that said that we would have these problems, believing that our desire to conform and assimilate would overcome a lot of problems... But the desire bred mistrust on both sides I think. I found that I couldn't live like the locals and only do what was necessary, and fudge the account books, and eat trash...Woody was totally indifferent to the customs that pervade business here, much of it insular and corrupt. That's why he failed at the car lot, he wouldn't play the games and be a good little Haolie and take the crumbs. He complained of the bad treatment and the discrimination and was dumped. WE are not satisfied with subsistence living. I know so many professionals working multiple jobs. I learned from my Dad and from my own experience that life is more than your job... That time to spend on living and quality of life is more important than a fat paycheck... but I still am willing to work for a paycheck and I dont care to live under a blue tarp, eating rice and maybe a bit of spam in it...That makes us "uppity townies bent on destroying the aina..."

I have found myself telling people "Why Ohio?...Its cheap to live there, and minimum wage is minimum wage...It goes a lot further there than here." "the federal government is focused on that state. There is a huge amount of job training and job creation going on there. Woody being a veteran will qualify for a lot of things that he has to stand in line for here. Me, I look like most of the ladies of my age there and perhaps wont have the struggle in finding myself a job."

I can go into the cheap housing and, and the available healthcare... but people dont see those things as reasons to give up my current home and business... One of Woody's friends in California was aghast and said "don't just go there because its cheap, there might be a reason for that. Go there because that is where you want to be..."

I want to be Kama'aina...here...but it is not to be...

What they all do not understand is that when you are being driven out, the place that is the opposite of what is driving you looks mighty attractive...

We are going to be ok. I have strange worries that I think most people dont think about ever.

Moving to Hawaii was the single most impressive thing that I have ever done in my life. I remember the looks on peoples faces when we told them we were in escrow on our home here. The look of envy... The way that Woody's boss pumped his hand congratulating him on fufilling HIS life long dream... Today... Strangers will read my weblog because I live here, people we meet will stand with mouth agape when we say we live here. I feel that I have gained creative credibility from my residence address is one of the most coveted in the world. I thrill people when I tell tales of active lava flows and flowering trees and the culture of an ancient and mystical people... a people that I dont think exist anymore...

Moving to Hawaii made me special after 38 years of struggling to establish identity in the world... Nothing else, but one other thing in my life has done this. Woody knows that I am giving this up... He didnt understand it, but now that it has a term he can use... I call it Cachet... Others admit its true... None of his rich boyhood pals resented or tried to talk him out of moving to Hawaii, they just wanted to know how far he was from the nearest golf course... Now they are like " OH MY GOD, Are you WACKO???" The "cachet" of Hawaii smoothed over a lot of things and made my leaving California and my invalid mother, Woody leaving all of his friends and starting over palatable. Moving to Ohio will leave a sour taste in many mouths, not all but many.

Let's bloody face it, Ohio has no cachet...Except to the politicos that are fighting over it as we speak. The state is too old and has spawned too many of us ordinary people that want to have "cachet"... We each know dozens that escaped the Midwest to other climes and would warn us of being trapped in the cold winters and the boring farmlife...Its poverty stricken cities and ruined industry... Yet...

Yet...

There is its proximity to some of the nations great cities.

There is its culture of values that mirror my own.

There is the beauty of nature and wild places

There is the rhythm of the dreaded seasons... the wide fields that are white the brown then green then gold then white again...The cycle of life that I miss very much in this land of eternal summer.

There is a chance to start over to re-invent myself once again

There is a vision of hope that God will finally let me come home to a place where I can belong... For if not there..Where?

November 02, 2004

President Bush is greeted by USA Freedom Corps Greeter Hilma Chang at Hickam Air Force Base in Honolulu, Hawaii, Oct. 23, 2003.


Or... You can choose a real man... a man of honesty and integrity who has brought us thorugh troubled times and will continue to do so day in and day out.

You will make that choice. Please go and vote today. You vote does count and makes a difference!

Today is the Day Please Vote....

You can choose this man...

November 01, 2004

All Saints Day- The Great Cloud of Witnesses

The Christ of Pahoa town... My "spoof" if you will of the incredible statues that tower over cities in South America. This one stands wreathed in leis on a grassy knoll below the Church of the Scared Heart in Pahoa... I can think of no other place here in Hawaii that needs the hand of God on it more, not only because of its drug infested and poverty striken past, it still has those things but this town of contrasts is at the forefront of the cataclysimic change that is overwelming this island and here is one place where there have already been clashes between the haves and the have nots, the "Townies" ie the mainland money running up the prices and the last vestages of Hippiedom that live under the blue tarps on the lava and under the trees....

Today is All Saints Day one of the few Catholic Holidays that this Baptist bred, Pentecostal Fire Baptized nonconformist observes. I think it behooves us of all faiths to think of those that have gone before us in spiritual things as well as the temperal things, and remember the scarifices and the triumphs...

I love this passage from Hebrews. Its not an easy read but it says ignore the past at your peril. The chapter prior is a recounting of the heros of the Jewish faith, and should I have put that on the blog, it would be so long a read, you will miss voting tomorrow and I cant have that!

Hbr 12:1 Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,
Hbr 12:2 fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.
Hbr 12:3 For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Hbr 12:4 You have not yet resisted to the point of shedding blood in your striving against sin;
Hbr 12:5 and you have forgotten the exhortation which is addressed to you as sons, "MY SON, DO NOT REGARD LIGHTLY THE DISCIPLINE OF THE LORD, NOR FAINT WHEN YOU ARE REPROVED BY HIM;
Hbr 12:6 FOR THOSE WHOM THE LORD LOVES HE DISCIPLINES, AND HE SCOURGES EVERY SON WHOM HE RECEIVES."
Hbr 12:7 It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom {his} father does not discipline?
Hbr 12:8 But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.
Hbr 12:9 Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?
Hbr 12:10 For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He {disciplines us} for {our} good, so that we may share His holiness.
Hbr 12:11 All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.
Hbr 12:12 Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble,
Hbr 12:13 and make straight paths for your feet, so that {the limb} which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.
Hbr 12:14 Pursue peace with all men, and the sanctification without which no one will see the Lord.
Hbr 12:15 See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many be defiled;
Hbr 12:16 that {there be} no immoral or godless person like Esau, who sold his own birthright for a {single} meal.
Hbr 12:17 For you know that even afterwards, when he desired to inherit the blessing, he was rejected, for he found no place for repentance, though he sought for it with tears.
Hbr 12:18 For you have not come to {a mountain} that can be touched and to a blazing fire, and to darkness and gloom and whirlwind,
Hbr 12:19 and to the blast of a trumpet and the sound of words which {sound was such that} those who heard begged that no further word be spoken to them.
Hbr 12:20 For they could not bear the command, "IF EVEN A BEAST TOUCHES THE MOUNTAIN, IT WILL BE STONED."
Hbr 12:21 And so terrible was the sight, {that} Moses said, "I AM FULL OF FEAR and trembling."
Hbr 12:22 But you have come to Mount Zion and to the city of the living God, the heavenly Jerusalem, and to myriads of angels,
Hbr 12:23 to the general assembly and church of the firstborn who are enrolled in heaven, and to God, the Judge of all, and to the spirits of {the} righteous made perfect,
Hbr 12:24 and to Jesus, the mediator of a new covenant, and to the sprinkled blood, which speaks better than {the blood} of Abel.
Hbr 12:25 See to it that you do not refuse Him who is speaking. For if those did not escape when they refused him who warned {them} on earth, much less {will} we {escape} who turn away from Him who {warns} from heaven.
Hbr 12:26 And His voice shook the earth then, but now He has promised, saying, "YET ONCE MORE I WILL SHAKE NOT ONLY THE EARTH, BUT ALSO THE HEAVEN."
Hbr 12:27 This {expression,} "Yet once more," denotes the removing of those things which can be shaken, as of created things, so that those things which cannot be shaken may remain.
Hbr 12:28 Therefore, since we receive a kingdom which cannot be shaken, let us show gratitude, by which we may offer to God an acceptable service with reverence and awe;
Hbr 12:29 for our God is a consuming fire.

I find the last verse chilling...

I would offer up a few of the heros of my faith, some past some present. I have found the stories of these men and women inspiring..

Heros past

Simon de Montfort, Earl of Leicester, was the forth son of the Count Amery de Monfort and came to England from his native France after a series of decisive victories in the Crusades. He appealed to his cousin the Earl of Chester to reture the Earldom of Leicester to his branch of the family from whom it was previously taken by King John. He was married to King Henry III sister, Eleanor, and was Governor of English land in Gascony for four years. He was to become the driving force behind the barons in the Second Barons' War.

In October 1258 the King accepted the Provisions of Oxford, but he had no intention of living by them. The barons that had written them had differing ideas of how far they should be taken. Simon de Montfort took them to their most extreme. He believed that the Council of Fifteen, set up by the Provisions of Oxford, could if necessary rule against the King's wishes. Edward, heir to the throne, believed the council should be a group of advisers and nothing more than that.

Civil War was inevitable. In May 1264 de Montfort won the Battle of Lewes and captured the king and his heir. Edward escaped and de Montfort fought and died at the Battle of Evesham in 1265. In 1267 the Provisions of Oxford and Westminster were revoked and the King could once again choose his own councillors.

From" This Septered Isle, Little known events of Englands History that shaped our lives..." BBC

Shaped our lived indeed, these "Oxford Provisions" are the Bill of Rights to the Magna Carta. Think of our Constitution without the Bill of Rights? The Earl Simon, a devout Believer, was one of the first noblemen to publically champion the rights of the lower born, and felt that all being created in Gods image should have the same rights and priviledges... a huge leap forward in civil rights thinking that wasnt really implemented in full until the 20th Century. He was revolutionary and paid the ultimate price for that thinking by losing his life the lives of his sons and the eventual total annaliation of his line. His story was politically cleansed and it was until the great Winston Churchill wrote of him in his histories that we get a full account of his actions. Our Founding Fathers patterned both the Declaration of Independence, and Bill of Rights with this document in mind.

Anne Marbury Hutchenson
Anne began her involvment with religion quite innocently, using her intelligence to interpret the only book available to her - the Bible. She had followed her beloved minister, Reverend John Cotton, whose removal to New England a year earlier had been "a great trouble to me...I could not be at rest but I must come hither."

The religious climate in the Massachusetts Bay Colony was oppresive. As the colony took hold, ministers emphasized everyone's pious duty to pray, fast and discipline oneself. Noting that the male members of Boston's church met regularly after sermons to discuss the Bible, she started to hold similar meetings for women in her own home. At first the women discussed the previous Sunday's sermons, but before long Anne began telling them of her own beliefs which differed from those of the Boston ministers. She attracted hundreds of women - aided by her reputation as a skilled midwife - and men, too, soon joined her discussion group.

Brilliant, articulate and learned in the Bible and theology, she denied that conformity with the religious laws were a sign of godliness and inisted that true godliness came from inner experience of the Holy Spirit.

you can read the rest of this biography here

This lady was one of the first spiritual leaders to teach The Grace of God as the way to God , Versus an oppressive series of laws and duties, and ritual. The mother of 17 children, her decendents went on the become statesmen and diplomats as well as theologians. Both President Bush and the Current Queen of England share in her blood line, President Bush being a direct descendent of Anne Hutchenson.

Modern Heros

One of them is Elisabeth Elliot Gren, I knew of her even before I became a Christian becasue of the incredible thing that she did after her first husband was murdered by the people that he had been trying to reach out to with the Gospel. She and the widow of another one of the murdered men and her 2 year old daughter went and lived with the people that killed her beloved husband... I dont think I could do that. She is a shining example of paitence perseverence and prayerfulness.

I have often featured her writings in my blog because I find her a voice of sanity in an ever increasingly insane world... She is known for many things including some very controversial views on dating... Did you know that dating as we do it in the West is not scriptural?... food for thought, I gave up dating and was found by Woody with some interesting results. I think her methods work. My only wish is that those that knew of the real issues that he has would have shared them with me so that we could have worked on solutions but that is a story for another day...

I also admire the family of Dr. Billy Graham... and not just the well known people, but the whole tribe. Think about the enormous pressure to be more than you are, because of public scrutiny. I know from personal friends that know them that this is not the case and that what you see is what you get with them and I admire that. I want to be that way. Transparent inside and out, and that is hard for me as I am a private person at the core.

Think about your heros and what values that they represent and be thankful that we have good role models and guides. That great Cloud of Witnesses stands with us in the Covenant of Grace, now and forever.